Love One Another?

Recently, driving from Columbia to Harrisburg, PA, I listened to Francis Chan’s book, “Crazy Love – Overwhelmed by a relentless God.” Our class MOVERS group is reading this together. I am not a book reviewer, but this one drives home several reminders for those of us who are believers:

•  That God is God, and we are not Him. Chan reminds readers of the Throne of God that John writes about in Revelation. Too often we try to humanize God to better understand Him, and then we end up trivializing God in the process.
• That many of us are less in love with God and more in love with the idea of His blessing our lives.
•  That when we draw near to God, God draws near to us.
•  God is not a duplicator; God is a creator. You and I are individually and wonderfully made.
•  If we recognize that everything belongs to God, we will eagerly sell our possessions and give to those in need.
• And, then, that we begin to see every person – regardless of prejudice or opinions or politics – as if that person is Jesus to be loved and served.

It was an intense book, and more than once I had to pull over at a rest area and just take a break from it. It was that last point that really got my attention. What would life look like – what would my life look like – if I saw every person as Jesus? As a believer, it would be impossible to ignore them. It would be impossible to pass on serving them. It would be impossible to stand on the sidelines and watch people suffer if I saw them as Jesus.

I was convicted by Chan’s last thought because I am an inconsistent follower of Jesus.
All of us are inconsistent followers of Jesus.

I am reminded of the person who woefully or arrogantly says (or thinks!), “I do this for people” and “I do that for people” and “I’m the only one doing anything” and “I do anything I’m ever asked to do for people.” This person is guilty of sinful pride. Sin always throws up a mirror and causes us to see ourselves, how we’ve been offended, how we’ve done more while others did less, and how life isn’t fair.
Serving others and then drawing unhealthy attention to it, well, that’s an inconsistent approach to following Jesus. I stand guilty; so do you. We must do better.

In New Mexico a few weeks ago, my Vicki and I heard Andy Root, professor of youth and family ministry at Luther Seminary in St. Paul, MN, speak on taking the gospel to new generations of Americans. You and I can’t afford to become old people and slink off into the spiritual sunset. We’ve got to stay fresh in our approach to culture, and be ready to help people discover the Lord by whatever means possible.

But, Andy got my attention when he closed with this: If you had five minutes to live, what would you tell a dying and lost word? What would you tell other believers? If you were a preacher, what would your last sermon be about?

And, for me, fresh off Chan’s mind-blowing book, I just thought, “Love One Another” from John 13:34-35, “So, now I am giving you (believers) a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my follower.”

•  John is really speaking to believers loving other believers, strengthening the fellowship and being an example to the world. But, that certainly doesn’t let us off the hook to love and serve everyone around us. We should love anyone and everyone toward a goal of introducing people to Jesus as their Savior, and helping them grow as disciples.
• We should love one another in the same ways that Jesus loves us: Service beyond convenience, sacrificially and unconditionally, and without prejudice.
•  If we each focused on loving one another as a priority today, people – especially unsaved people – would notice a supernatural power at work and begin to ask about it.

I won’t be so forward as to say you should exercise your love for one another in specific ways. I won’t be so condescending as to say you should feel guilty if you don’t love people this way or that way. I won’t be so self-righteous as to say you are failing if you don’t love people through the same ministries God has called me to serve. Somewhere in all of that would be sin – me trying to set the guidelines for you. Lean on Scripture and the Lord’s whisper in all that you do. He will guide you exactly where He needs you to be in loving and serving others.

The lesson here is to love one another, personally and privately in everyday life. I do believe that God calls each of us to be the “hands and feet” of the church, and I believe He desires for each of us to be involved in ministry to others through the church. That may manifest itself through children’s ministry, student ministry, missions ministry (local, state, national or international), prison ministry, ministry to those who are in poverty, hospitality ministry, usher ministry, prayer ministry, music and worship ministry, small group ministry, Sunday School ministry, and the list goes on and on and on. You don’t have to be involved in each of these – seek the Lord’s place for you within the church (and within our class), and listen to His calling on where and how you should serve. (1 Corinthians reminds us that all the parts of the body are needed and that each has its own function and contribution). Then, passionately get involved around your spiritual giftedness and personal calling.

If you are a leader in ministry or desire to lead out in ministry, I’d love to hear how the class might support you as you might lead us. Class ministry involvement most often does not begin or end with me – it begins with you. In fact, I can tell you that I may not be involved in every class ministry, but I will support all of them.

As you and I do better at “love one another,” we will fulfill Matthew 25:35-36 when Jesus said, “For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.” This is not an exhaustive list, but a starting place of ways you and I can show mercy to people each day.

Today, as you walk through your day, quietly love those around you as if they are Jesus. And, begin praying for how God can use you through one of our class and / or church ministries to bring Jesus to others. 

God's playbook for parents

Today is Mother's Day 2012.
I believe it’s important for us to honor our mothers on this special day. By honor, I don’t necessarily mean shower them with gifts, or flowers or candy or take them to fancy restaurants. By honor, I mean recognize these special women beyond the cliche of a Hallmark card. Honor for me means going deeper than a few hours of celebration. We should take time to verbally say "thank you" and mostly, demonstrate by words and actions that we love our mothers. Mother's Day is a day to refocus on the women who brought us into the world, likely influenced our faith lives, and often serve as an important rudder in our family life. It's so much deeper than a casual and annual celebration.

As I prepared this lesson, focusing on Scripture's voice on motherhood, the Lord kept convicting me as a dad, too. We know that the role of parent is trumped only by Holy marriage in God's pecking order of relationships. All other Earthly relationships fall into place behind marriage, first, and parenting, second.

For parents, Psalm 127:3-5 states "children are a gift from the Lord, they are a reward from Him." In Titus 2:4, Paul writes, "Older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands. They will not bring shame on the word of God." But, Paul - as he also does in Ephesians 5 - follows this directive with a word for dads, instructing us  "to do good works of every kind, and let everything you do reflect the integrity and seriousness of your teaching. Teach the truth." Paul doesn't single out mothers - he starts with the dad as the spiritual head of the household, creating an environment of love and spiritual direction. Then, he gives instruction to the mom, accordingly, to form this glove of parenthood around His gift - the children. Scripture doesn't single out moms and dads as much as it speaks to the total household.

So, as I prepared for Mother's Day, I found myself engulfed in Parent's Day. That led me to write God's Playbook For Parents (based on material from www.gotquestions.org). You may read this and say, "Scott, my children are grown, but keep in mind Paul's instruction that "the older must train the younger." I believe those of us who have lived and learned have a responsibility to encourage those who are younger.

God's Playbook For Parents - 7 Things To Make Us Better Moms And Dads
1. Be available. Deuteronomy 6:6-7 – “Repeat (my commands) again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.” Certainly, we are to always keep faith in front of our children, but to do that we must be with our children - we must be available. That doesn't mean overbearing, especially as they leave the nest, but it does mean "being there." I'm amazed at how many parents stop parenting, especially when their children begin driving. My boys know - because I tell them every day - "We are always here." Doesn't that reflect God's message to us?
2. Be involved. Ephesians 6:4 – “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the disciple and instruction that comes from the Lord.” We tend to pigeon-hole this to recreation activities. "We will be involved together at the ballpark, the gymnasium, the soccer fields, or this and that." Being involved isn't the same as being involved in a community or school activity together. When the scoreboard turns off - will you know your children? Will he or she know you? Being involved goes deeper - taking time for one-on-one discussion, thinking and discerning life together. Being involved is about communication, encouragement and instruction. It's taking time to slow down and knowing your children. Personally, I have discovered that a fire pit in the back yard - away from television screens - has become a place for great, deep and purposeful conversations.
3. Be a teacher. Psalm 78:5-6 – “For he issued his laws to Jacob, he gave his instructions to Israel. He commanded our ancestors to teach them to their children so the next generation might know them – even the children not yet born – and they in turn will teach their own children.” As believers, we are called to teach our children about faith and to create homes with a Biblical worldview (not a separatist view, but a sacrificial view). My only mission as a parent is to reproduce another generation of believers. If I do that, I'm successful.It won't be healthcare, the economy, or who we elect as president that kills our country - it's going to be a failure of families to reproduce believers into the world. If you don't know how to teach faith in your home, well, that's one of the benefits of plowing your life into a fellowship of believers - the church and / or a Sunday School class. (By the way, it's never too late to talk to your children about faith, and to begin a journey together).

4. Be a trainer. Romans 12:3-8 is a passage related to the authentic living of our spiritual gifts. Training is not just "do this, do that" lip service. Training is living a life that helps children develop skills, discover strengths, and discover spiritual giftedness. Training is modeling the life you want your children to live as adults. Should we be surprised when parents live "this way" and produce children who act the same way? Good or bad. Parents must model the expected way to live. Training is also helping your children discover what God wants them to do, which may not be what you want them to do or even what they want to do. They belong to God. We are the managers of His gifts to us.
5. Be a disciplinarian. Proverbs 13:24 - "Those who spare the rod of discipline hate their children. Those who love their children care enough to discipline them.” Many parents are so busy and distracted that they compensate by working overtime to ensure their children are happy. This leads to anarchy in the home. We must draw boundaries for our children, draw them clearly, draw them consistently, and have an unwavering and consistent penalty for crossing the boundaries. This is not an angry, emotional response. It is a clear and calculated form of cause-effect parenting that is bathed in love. Discipline without love is not discipline. Remember: Being a believer means equal parts encouragement and correction.
6. Be a nurturer. 1 Peter 3:8-9 – For all believers, “Symphathize with one another, love each other as brothers and sisters. Be tenderhearted and keep a humble attitude. Don’t repay evil for evil. Don’t retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing.” Parents should work to create environments of constant verbal support, freedom to fail, acceptance, affection and unconditional love. I know that I have disappointed my parents, but I also know it did not affect their love for me. Around our home, we use the Motel 6 language that "the light is always on for you."
7. Be a parent of integrity.  Proverbs 11:3 – “Honesty drives good people.” It is important for us to live out the faith we claim to have. Our children are learning character education in school because overall it's not being taught in homes - rich or poor. I've seen the disappointment in my boys' eyes when they see my words and actions fall short of the character education they are learning in school. That's chilling to me. If our behavior at home is inconsistent with behavior they are taught at school and church, it becomes easy for them to discount parents and home life. Do we really want that? Is it really God's plan for families? Shouldn't character education be modeled at home? Yes. So, as parents, we must ask, "What does Jesus think about these actions, words and thoughts?" And, we must be willing to get help to improve our family lives.

On this Mother’s Day – and if you can remember Father’s Day next month :) – take time to move beyond the gifts, or movie, or picnic – use today to demonstrate your love for spouse, tell your children how much you love them, plunge your day into them, tell them stories from your childhood, and model the life you want them to live after you are gone.

Pressing toward the goal

By Derek Miller - My Dad’s family is quite large.  His mother was one of twelve children who grew up in Southeast Alabama and each of them had many children and grandchildren.  One of my Dad’s cousins, Sidney Brown, had a child named Ashley who was one of the meanest troublemakers out there.  On one of our family trips to Dothan, my parents told me that I “should not taken anything off of Ashley and if he caused any trouble, I had permission to knock the tar out of him.”  To me, being about 11 years old, that was like saying that I had a “Get out of Jail” free card.  So, as we arrived, I looked for my opportunity to knock Ashley out.  My grandmother lived near a grave yard and my cousins, Ashley and I went off to “go play” in the cemetery.  Ashley started acting up and even though it was not major issue, I took my opportunity to bloody Ashley up.  He went home screaming that I had beaten him up.  When my parents asked me why I had done this in the middle of everyone, I simply replied, “Because you told me that if he gave me any trouble, I had your permission to beat the tar out of him.”  You could have heard a pin drop in the middle of that room.

I have to admit that I took a lot of pleasure in beating Ashley up.  But, I also have to admit that this is sin.  That is the way that sin works.  It is something that can feel good and is easy to do.  Man is sinful by nature and it is why we are separated from God.  That separation from God is exactly why I need Jesus to be my Savior.  In Romans 5:8, it says, “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this:  While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”  I accepted Christ as my Savior at a backyard Bible club at our neighbor Nancy Puffer’s house at the age of 12.  That was an acknowledgment that I was a sinner and needed salvation through Jesus Christ.  We cannot save ourselves and God cannot look on our sin without Christ’s intervening on our behalf.  Therefore, God provided a path for us to gain salvation.  Have you ever really stopped to think about that?  God sent His Son to die for our sins.  Why would He do that?  Why would Jesus have to come to earth in the form of a human?  The following story sums it up very well. 

The Man and the Birds by Paul Harvey

The man to whom I’m going to introduce you was not a scrooge; he was a kind decent, mostly good man. Generous to his family, upright in his dealings with other men. But he just didn’t believe all that incarnation stuff which the churches proclaim at Christmas Time. It just didn’t make sense and he was too honest to pretend otherwise. He just couldn’t swallow the Jesus Story, about God coming to Earth as a man.

“I’m truly sorry to distress you,” he told his wife, “but I’m not going with you to church this Christmas Eve.” He said he’d feel like a hypocrite. That he’d much rather just stay at home, but that he would wait up for them. And so he stayed and they went to the midnight service.

Shortly after the family drove away in the car, snow began to fall. He went to the window to watch the flurries getting heavier and heavier and then went back to his fireside chair and began to read his newspaper. Minutes later he was startled by a thudding sound…Then another, and then another. Sort of a thump or a thud…At first he thought someone must be throwing snowballs against his living room window. But when he went to the front door to investigate he found a flock of birds huddled miserably in the snow. They’d been caught in the storm and, in a desperate search for shelter, had tried to fly through his large landscape window.

Well, he couldn’t let the poor creatures lie there and freeze, so he remembered the barn where his children stabled their pony. That would provide a warm shelter, if he could direct the birds to it.

Quickly he put on a coat, galoshes, tramped through the deepening snow to the barn. He opened the doors wide and turned on a light, but the birds did not come in. He figured food would entice them in. So he hurried back to the house, fetched bread crumbs, sprinkled them on the snow, making a trail to the yellow-lighted wide open doorway of the stable. But to his dismay, the birds ignored the bread crumbs, and continued to flap around helplessly in the snow. He tried catching them…He tried shooing them into the barn by walking around them waving his arms…Instead, they scattered in every direction, except into the warm, lighted barn.

And then, he realized that they were afraid of him. To them, he reasoned, I am a strange and terrifying creature. If only I could think of some way to let them know that they can trust me…That I am not trying to hurt them, but to help them. But how? Because any move he made tended to frighten them, confuse them. They just would not follow. They would not be led or shooed because they feared him.

“If only I could be a bird,” he thought to himself, “and mingle with them and speak their language. Then I could tell them not to be afraid. Then I could show them the way to safe, warm…to the safe warm barn. But I would have to be one of them so they could see, and hear and understand.”

At that moment the church bells began to ring. The sound reached his ears above the sounds of the wind. And he stood there listening to the bells – Adeste Fidelis – listening to the bells pealing the glad tidings of Christmas.

And he sank to his knees in the snow.

While accepting Christ is the most important step in our Christian walk, it is by no means the only step.  We are then called upon to love and serve both God and other people.  This is more than a cliché for our class.  God gives the command in Deuteronomy and several other locations in the Old Testament to love God with all your heart, soul and mind.  Leviticus tells us that we are to love our neighbor as ourselves.  Jesus answers questions from the Pharisees in the New Testament when they ask Him what the greatest commandments are.  In Matthew 22:37-40, Jesus answers that we are to love God and others.  When we love and serve God and love and serve others, we are demonstrating Jesus living in us.  Deeds alone will not provide our salvation, but they are a testimony to Jesus living in us.  Throughout the Gospels, Jesus provides many examples of loving and serving God and others.  We should do likewise.

Next on our Faith journey and very intertwined with loving and serving God and others is being on Mission for God.  We have to look for opportunities to be on Mission for God and then take those opportunities.  In his book, “When the Game is Over, It All Goes Back in the Box”, author John Ortberg talks about “shadow missions.”  He defines a “shadow mission” this way.  “My shadow mission is what I will do with my life if I drift on autopilot.  It consists of the activities toward which I will gravitate if I allow my natural temptations and selfishness to take over.  Everybody has a shadow mission.”  We have to figure out what our “true mission” is and go toward it.

In the Old Testament book of Esther, we are told of the many twists and turns that allow a young Jewish girl to become queen of the nation.  She has been raised by her cousin Mordecai who continues to provide her with advice.  As the king’s chief of staff, Haman, has been offended by Mordecai and has the king issue an edict that will essentially kill all the Jews in the land.  Esther must take the chance of going before the king when she has not been summoned, an offense which can result in death.  In chapter 4, verse 14, Mordecai says that “who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?” 

Esther is able to turn the tables on Haman and save her people.  Her shadow mission was to live in the lap of luxury as queen, but her true mission was to be in the right place at the right time to be used by God to save her people.  How often are we brought into circumstances simply because of other events, but our true mission is to do the work of our Lord?  Have you ever thought that where you are today is no accident?  Who knows but that you have come to your position for such a time as this?  I was brought to South Carolina by my job.    That is not my true mission.  My true mission is to be an instrument for the Lord.  I purchased a house in a neighborhood.  Was I simply there to live in the house and not do anything for God?  My children attended school here.  Were their interactions only to learn and not do anything else?  My wife’s job was here.  Was she simply to sit on the sidelines and not teach her 4 year old classes while she was here?

A good illustration of this principle is captured in the movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life”.  In that movie, George Bailey wants to travel the world and become rich and famous.  As the story plays out, however, he learns that his true mission is to help other people.   This is evidenced by what he learns when Clarence the angel shows him what would have happened if he had never been born.  How are you positively influencing those around you and being on Mission for God?  In other words, what are you doing in the place and position that you find yourself in to further God’s kingdom?

Lastly, we have to recognize that our Christian journey is just that—a journey.  We will reach our destination when we go to heaven, but on this side of heaven, we are called to keep on working.  Jesus never talks about retirement from Christian work.  Even the apostle Paul talks about the need to press on in Philippians 3:12-14.  We must keep pressing on.  We are to accept Christ as Savior, we are to love and serve god and others, we are to remain on Mission for God’s purposes and we are to keep doing these last two and continuing to help others know and accept Christ as Savior all of the days we are on this earth. 

I have learned many things on a pilgrim on this journey during our nearly six years in Lexington and I know that God’s work continues as we go forward.  Although we will be laboring in different areas, we are to continue pressing on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called us heavenward in Christ Jesus.  Thanks to all of you for what you mean to me and my family and the work that we will continue to do in Christ Jesus.  Blessings to each of you and I leave with the verses in Philippians 1:2-6.  May we continue to press on and God bless each of you!

Forward in faith

From Derek Miller ~ Back in the early ‘70’s, I fashioned myself to be a pretty good baseball player.  I could hit the ball fairly well and was a pretty good fielder.  I enjoyed going to practice and playing in the games.  Most of my practices were fairly close to home and my parents were reliable to pick me up after practice.  One day, however, our practice was held at a local elementary school that was positioned by one of the malls in the city.  Relatively speaking, it was pretty far away from my house.  My mom dropped me off at 4:00 for practice and the last thing she said as I got out of the car was, “your Dad will be here to pick you up” and she drove away.  At about 5:15, our practice ended and other players started leaving the field.  Many asked if I needed a ride and I would just reply cheerfully, “oh no, my Dad is going to be here to pick me up.”  Finally, the school yard cleared and I was the only kid left there.  The time went by, 5:30, 5:45, 6:00 and my Dad had not arrived.  Remember this was before cell phones or texts, so I had no way of knowing what the hold up was.  As it started moving toward darkness at about 7:25, I hatched the idea that I would walk to the mall and call home—how I was going to do that, I have no idea as I had no money to use in the pay phone.  As I started walking away from the field, an approaching car caught my attention—it was my Dad and brother coming.  So, I ran back to the school to meet them as they passed me by.  It seems that my Dad had forgotten that he needed to pick me up and I was there alone for over 2 hours waiting on him.

I was never so fearful in my life when I was waiting for him and had no idea why he was not there.  Our heavenly Father, on the other hand, is there for us.  The hardest part for us is that we have to completely trust Him and have faith that He is going to be there for us and direct our paths.  Just like the fear that I experienced wondering where my earthly Father was when I was sitting at that practice field, I am sometimes paralyzed by fear—fear of the unknown in my future.  In Proverbs 3:5-6, it says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him and he will make your path straight.”  In the King James Version, the last part of that verse says that, “He shall direct your paths.”  Notice that we are not called upon to trust in the Lord with some of our heart, or most of our heart, but every single bit of our hearts.  In the same way, we are called upon in all of our ways to acknowledge Him.  That can be easy to say and very difficult to put into practice every single time we are faced with a challenge.

With our upcoming transfer to Georgia, we had lots of questions.  While we are familiar with the area and it would seem that it would be easy to re-acclimate back there, we were faced with lots of decisions that had big impacts.  Most all of those were encapsulated in one big decision—where would we live.  While we had our own ideas of where that should be, we turned it over to God to help us make the decisions.   We thought we should look at areas closer to our offices.  We would continue to rule out areas further away.  While we watched, many houses that we looked at, started dropping out as options pretty early on.  One house that we really liked and was the first house on our list, went under contract in early March.  It was located further away from our offices so we dismissed that as being expected when we looked at it and kept moving forward because it was not in our desired location.  That house came back on the market and we continued to pray for God’s guidance as we looked.  I even remarked to our realtor that it might get to the point, where we would need a neon sign outside of a home saying, “This is the One”.  As we continued the process, many homes came on the market and we would pray for discernment as to which house we should choose.  One by one, those houses went under contract.  It became so concerning that we contacted our realtor and asked her if we needed to go ahead and come earlier than planned to find a house.  She indicated that we should.  So, in late March, we went over and started looking at houses again.  We saw one house that we really liked in the same neighborhood as the other one we liked.  Joyce and I discussed which one we would prefer and we prayed for God’s discernment.  During that week, the 2^nd house sold and we were left with the original house in that neighborhood.  As we walked up to the house on our realty tour, we could see a sign in the foyer.  There was a neon green poster board that said, “This is the One!”  While we know the realtors had talked, it became evident that the sign was right.  As we negotiated the price, the counter-offer came back right where we had hoped to be if we were buying the house.  The very next day, another offer came in but we had an agreed price by then.  It was not where we originally thought we would be, but it was evident that it is where God wanted us to be.

A few weeks ago, Pastor Mike told the story in Joshua where the Israelites were crossing over the Jordan River heading into the Promised Land.  In Joshua 3:14-17, it indicated that the Jordan River was at flood stage.  Joshua directed the priests carrying the Ark of the Covenant to go forward.  As soon as they stepped their feet into the Jordan, the river water started backing up and the people crossed over on dry land.  Notice something here.  God did not tell the Israelites to stand on the sidelines until He was ready for them and then the miracle would happen.  He did not say, wait until I part the water in front of you before you cross.  They actually had to take steps forward in faith to step into the water before the miracle occurred.  Before they did that, they had no idea what was being planned.  They had to “trust in the Lord with all their hearts and lean not on their own understanding.”

In the book we just recently started in MOVERS called “Crazy Love” by author and Pastor Francis Chan, he talks about our minds are the size of a soda can and our God is as vast as the ocean.  Do I really want to have faith in and serve a God that I can compact into a space that I can comprehend and understand everything that He is doing?  Having read the entire Bible, I am yet to find where it says that we will always have complete understanding of everything that God is up to.  What it does say in several places is that we are to trust in the Lord.  In Proverbs, I am called upon to trust with my entire heart and acknowledge Him in everything that I do and He will direct my paths.  Just like the people of Israel, we have to move forward and let God direct us where we need to go even if we don’t fully understand what is going on.  Also, in Deuteronomy 31:6, God tells Moses to “be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified. . ., for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you.”  With promises like that, are you willing to take the first steps of faith and let Him direct your paths?

Companionship

A key leader at Lexington Baptist Church, Jerry Tarlton, died this past week. All of those who knew Jerry have a blessed assurance that he is with Jesus today.

The visitation was this past Friday night, advertised from 6-8 p.m., at Caughman-Harman Funeral Home in Lexington.

I wanted badly to be at the visitation, to speak to Jerry’s wife Pat, and to meet his family. I also wanted to be around my “faith family” that I knew would be assembling there. I wanted to pay my respects to Jerry’s memory, too. But, my Pony League baseball team had a game on Friday night. Knowing how much Jerry loved baseball and our local Dixie program, I knew he would want me to be at the game rather than the visitation.

The game wrapped up about 8:30. Vicki and I met at home about 9, and decided to grab some dinner. Since I can remember, I have celebrated baseball victory with Kentucky Fried Chicken. So, off we went to KFC, passing Caughman-Harman Funeral Home on the way. There were still cars in the parking lot – an hour after the visitation was supposed to have ended. So, we made a last minute decision to step inside the visitation.

At 10:10 p.m., Vicki and I got home from the visitation (with our chicken). The visitation for this good man lasted almost four hours – far beyond the advertised time.

Standing at the end of the receiving line, I overheard someone say, “I knew that Jerry knew lots of people, but I had no idea that he touched so many people's lives.” Do you see the powerful difference in knowing and serving?

Through Lexington Baptist Church involvement, our local Dixie baseball league, his work with Farm Bureau Insurance and living within our community, Jerry Tarlton had plowed his life into a lot of people and allowed a lot of people to plow into his life as well. I was deeply reminded of why we live this life we are given: We live it to link arm-in-arm with other believers to love and serve the Lord, to love and serve others, and to open ourselves to be loved and to be served. (Yep, it’s important for us to allow others to exercise faith in our direction – to fail at that is sinful.)

In Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, the great King Solomon writes: “Two people can accomplish more than twice as much as one; they get a better return for their labor. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But people who are alone when they fall are in real trouble. And on a cold night, two under the same blanket can gain warmth from each other. But, how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.”

These verses are about companionship, especially among like-minded followers of Jesus. Where are you? Are you linked arm-in-arm with other believers? Have you pulled a seat up to the camp fire? Are you in the game? Or, are you trying to navigate this life all by yourself? Are you on the fringe of fire’s warmth – freezing and in the dark? Are you sitting in the stands, watching the game you should be playing?

And, a warning. Satan is real. He is wanting to destroy you and all that you love.

He wants you and me to be isolated from the fellowship of other believers. He wants us turning to non-believers for good advice on faith, marriage, parenting and relationships. He wants us to be lonely, self-indulged, and looking in the mirror. Because he knows that if we are isolated, well, we will remain in sinful, stale and unfulfilling lives, unchallenged, unchecked, and mediocre at best. No one will come to Jesus because of us.

Companionship.
We were not created to be isolated from one another. We were made to enjoy one another, to lift each other up, and to reflect the Savior who loves us.

Planning: From here to there

Vicki and I have been slowly remodeling a few rooms in our home. Remodeling to us is pretty self-contained: (a) Clean and throw away; (b) Strip old wallpaper and paint; (c) Rethink what’s on the walls; and (d) Update some furniture. (When one corner of the sofa is propped up by three books, it’s time for a new one.)

At one point in this multi-phase, multi-year remodeling plan, Vicki came across a box of old stuff. From this box, she placed three items on my desk. One was an old program from a black-tie event we attended during our engagement. One was the program for the 1983 Sugar Bowl, which we attended in New Orleans. The third was a multi-page love letter that I wrote her in 1983 – a little over a year after we had started dating. For our 20^th wedding Anniversary, we put together a scrapbook that includes letters I wrote her during our five years of long-distance dating. The scrapbook also includes cards we exchanged, and some black and white pictures from our first Valentine’s Day together. The letter before me was one that needed to be in the scrapbook, and that’s why she put it on my desk. As I read it, thinking back to the 24-year-old boy who wrote it, I had to pause, laugh and even flinch at some of the words before me.

It was encouraging to read, in my own words, a reminder to Vicki that I had prayed for her before I even knew her. It was encouraging to read my reminder that she was an answered prayer. I had been through a lot, even at 24, and knew that God was in control of my life. There had already been too many answered prayers and too many moments when God reminded me of his presence. I can take you to the exact location – the exact spot – where I got on my knees in that bathroom apartment, acknowledged that God knew who she was while I didn’t, and asked him to go ahead and send her to me. It was only a few weeks later that we met. Reading those words from the past, I was reminded at how faithful God is to each of us. In Jeremiah 29:11, God reminds his people: “For I know the plans I have for you. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me. I will be found by you.”

God knows. God knows what? God knows everything.

What confidence we can take in those words from Jeremiah. As followers of Jesus, we are minded that God is with us and He is already in our future. He knows our future and we can have hope in it. God says His plans are good and not for disaster. That doesn’t mean we will be spared pain, suffering and hardship, but it does mean that our lives will be with Him, and He will see us through this life to a glorious conclusion with Him.

And, God reminds us that when we pray wholeheartedly (earnestly), He will listen and we will find him. This is not a casual, reckless, ADHD approach to prayer. Praying earnestly means a focused, intense, purging of self and crying out to the Lord. My prayer for Vicki was like that. In fact, I’ve had times when my prayer posture was simply flat on the floor heaving my life out to the Lord. When you do that – when you get to that place, friends – you will literally feel the power and peace of Almighty God. You will never question or doubt again His love for you and the peace that comes from a relationship with Him through Jesus Christ.

But, also within that letter were words that made me flinch. While acknowledging God’s sending of Vicki to me, I quickly defaulted to my plans for us. In several paragraphs, I spelled out my plans for us related to all things of the Earth. I spelled out that we would do this and do that, have this and have that, and go here and go there. And, not one time did I place those plans at the feet of my Lord and say, “but, all things according to your will for us.” And, that’s the problem with planning. We go to God with the big stuff, and then we default to our plans for the day-to-day stuff. James 4:13 reminds us, “Look here, you people who say, ‘Today or tomorrow we are going to a certain town and will stay there a year. We will do business and make a profit – How do you know what will happen tomorrow? For your life is like the morning fog – it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. What you ought to say is, ‘if the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.’ Otherwise, you will be boasting about your own plans, and all such boasting is evil.”

Is it wrong to plan? No. But, we must square our plans with God’s plans for us. That means we should be praying for our tomorrow in keeping with God’s place in tomorrow. We should surrender our tomorrow to the God who is already there on our behalf. And, we can’t boast about our plans because that’s equivalent of saying, “I am in charge of my life, not the Lord.” And, Scripture says we can’t follow two masters – we will either follow self or we will follow God. (Matthew 6:24)

Here’s some other Scripture for you:

Proverbs 19:21 – Many are the plans in a man’s heart but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.
Proverbs 27:1 – Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring forth.
Job 17:11 – My days have passed, my plans are shattered, and so are the desires of my heart.

In Luke 12:13-21 – Jesus tells the parable of the rich fool – “a person is a fool to store up earthly wealth but not have a rich relationship with God.”

So, what are we to do?

1. When God says in Jeremiah 1:5 that he knew you and me before we were born, and He says He has plans for you – what are those plans? Go to the Lord and earnestly ask Him. Just cry out to the Lord, ‘Help me, I’m tired. I need a new direction. I need to be a better spouse, parent, child, sibling, friend. I can no longer do this or that on my own. I must have you.” Lay it out there.

2. How do I know I am doing what God wants me to do? First, get past the notion that God’s plan for you is tied to your career in some way. Certainly, God’s plans for you may involve your gifts and strengths and passions related to work, but ultimately God’s plans for you will involve the sacrificial love and service toward others in the name of Jesus. You may need to change careers. You may even need to move to another place. But, God’s calling will not involve chaos and confusion – ultimately, you will be at peace with it.

3. How do I discover God’s plan for me? Pray earnestly, and listen to the encouragement of other believers. I believe that one of the ways God speaks to us is through other believers. Are you surrounding yourself with them? Are you allowing Satan to weed you out from the fellowship of believers, living alone and without that encouragement?

Excuses - "They are a bunch of hypocrites."

Should you find yourself on Family Feud, and you are asked to name the excuses people give for not attending church (engaging faith with other believers), the No. 1 answer will be this one: “They (Christians / church attenders) are a bunch of hypocrites.” I found LifeWay research information, from 2008, that indicates 72 percent of those who are unchurched believe church-attenders are hypocrites. In more direct terms, many people believe you and I are liars when it comes to living out our faith. Many of the unchurched believe you and I don’t practice what we preach, and that we are less than authentic when it comes to our public and private personalities.

Hypocrisy is such a complicated topic because each and every person struggles with it. The sickly world we occupy calls us to be this way, and the Holy Spirit within us calls us to be another way. It doesn’t take long for us to get twisted up and turned around. Fighting hypocrisy – and it comes in lots of different forms and fashions – can only be conquered when we completely focus on Jesus, and trust Him to make our paths straight, our decisions right, and our focus on God’s plan for us.

Without diving deeply into the etymology of the word, hypocrite comes from the ancient Greek playhouses, when actors would perform a role on stage and the role was contradictory to who they were in life. That has fed our culture today – “publicly play acting” a different person from who we are privately.

When I was ordained, in October 2011, pastor Mike’s charge to me was very simple, “Protect the calling.” That really resonated with me. If I’m going to be “set apart” for gospel ministry by the church, my life must conform to that calling. I have a responsibility to live up to the Lord’s calling on my life. But, it goes much deeper than that for me. Shouldn’t Mike’s charge apply to every single one of us? When we are “converted” by the Holy Spirit, we are changed. Each of us is called out to follow the Lord, and that means we must protect our individual calling. If the Lord called you to lay down your life’s ambition and desire, and follow Him, and you genuinely received that call, it stands to reason the Holy Spirit changed you from that person to a new person. I’m not suggesting that you and I go about forced changing, but that we let the Lord convict and massage and change what He needs to change within each of us. Some of our personality quirks need to stick around, some of the good and fun things we enjoy may need to stay in place because they become valuable in building relationship with others and helping us introduce people to Jesus.

It comes down to this really: As believers, we can’t act or claim to be one way in public, but let selfish attitudes rule our private thinking. Ultimately, those private weaknesses will become public ones, and in that conflict – we express our hypocrisy. And, people see it. And, as we trumpet faith publicly, but live as unbelievers privately, we pollute the entire pond for the entire faith community. Consider:

1. The believer who says church participation is important for my family . . . as long as it makes my family happy and is convenient to our schedule.
2. The believer who advises prayer by those who are hurting, but then comes unglued when their own life turns into a deep valley. Or worse, uses prayer as an indictment, as in, “You need to fall on your knees and pray about your attitude toward me!”
3. The believer who whispers about the shortcomings and personality flaws of others, but fails to see the sinfulness in that shadowy form of gossip and character assassination.
4. The believer who carries a Bible, but never uses it. Or worse, uses the Bible as a weapon to beat people up, and then put it back on the dusty bookshelf.
5.  The believer who gives generously, but then circles back around to ensure most everyone knows it.
6. The believer who claims to follow Jesus, but then denies Jesus by their actions and words under just the right amount of peer pressure. (I believe we may need to wade into the murkier areas of life, at times, in order to shine for Jesus. If I’m never around unbelievers and within their environment, how can stand as a testimony for Jesus? I just have to be careful not to compromise my faith, and create questions of hypocrisy in the minds of others).

It’s these inconsistencies by the team’s players that cause the spectators – the unchurched – to say, “That team is in complete disarray. They don’t believe what they say they believe. Why in the world would I want to be involved in that mess.”

It’s true, we Christians are a confused, muddled, and hypocritical bunch. The road of spiritual growth is not easy because of the sickly world that we live in. It’s true that sometimes even the best of us look and act more like unbelievers than we do believers. None of us are immune to it because of the internal struggle between human nature and the Holy Spirit.

Jesus, in Matthew 23:1-39, confronts spiritual leaders who were indeed hypocrites. In some Bibles, this extended passage is titled “Seven Woes” because Jesus essentially comes out heavy with a warning and a threat. For all of us – as believers - , I feel, Jesus is warning us to avoid:

•  Creating man-made rules forced into Scripture and presented as God’s laws.
• Telling people to obey Scripture, but not obeying Scripture ourselves.
•  Obeying Scripture, not to honor God, but to make ourselves look good. Caring about looking holy, rather than being holy.
• Using the church for personal gain – love of positions outweighing love of the Lord.
• Allowing love of the church to get in front of our love of Jesus.
• Focusing our giving on the money, but never giving time or never giving abilities in service.
•  Washing the outside of the cup, but never washing the inside of it. Taking care of your heart and mind will lead to a beautiful person on the outside.

But, I also have a word to the unchurched, who wag their fingers and use hypocrisy as an excuse to avoid church and faith.

Faith and by extension – church – is not for the perfect, or the pretty, or the ducks-in-a-row, or the healthy – church is for the sick, the hurting, the lonely, the tired, the hungry, the thirsty, the poor in spirit, the angry, the frustrated, the worried, and the weary. Church is sanctuary from the world – sanctuary for broken and busted people, who know the only way to put things back together is through Jesus. You will never find a perfect person in church. You will find spiritually sick, relationally sick, physically sick and emotionally sick people – just like you and just like me! – but who know Jesus as Savior and are walking in a “love and serve” relationship with others. I would rather be forgiven of my contradictions and in faith, than lost in my contradictions – separated from fellowship with God and the love of other believers.

And, we believers must understand that we are each ailing – we must be here with arms wide open – working out our own hypocrisies and inconsistencies – laying down our attitudes so we love and serve anyone and everyone the Lord chooses to send our way. It’s not what we say that matters, it’s how we live out what we say that matters, and how we live it out for everyone around us – not just those that make us comfortable.