Sliding back in faith

Let’s not beat around the bush . . . it’s difficult to be a follower of Jesus.
In Matthew 16:24-25, Jesus said, “If anyone comes after me – follows me – accepts me as Savior – he MUST (1) deny himself; (2) take up his cross; and (3) follow me."

These are the characteristics of a Jesus follower. There is no wiggle room, compromise or rationalization:

1. The believer must deny himself. That means I pray for God's plans for me and not my plans for me. What does God want for me? Where does God need me? 
2. The believer's life must take up a cross: It must produce other believers and as I talk to people about Jesus those conversations will cost me something. Sharing Jesus is often inconvenient, emotionally draining, expensive and leads us out of comfort zones. As it cost Jesus to die on the cross we must expect following Him will cost us something, too.
3. The believer's life is about serving others. It is about following Jesus' example to serve others above self.

It’s easy to see why many, many people won’t follow Jesus. They completely rebel against God's desire to be at the center of their lives through faith in Jesus. But, these good people can't admit they won't follow Jesus. No, they lie about it or rationalize it. Or, they divert conversations to church rather than Jesus. Or, they equate good, moral behavior with being Christian. It's funny how people work so hard to say the right things when they don't mean them.

Ultimately, all followers of Jesus have one thing in common: They build relationships with people, talk about Jesus within those relationships, and introduce people to Jesus so that some may follow Him. If my life fails to produce other believers it's really impossible to say that I am following Jesus.

Following Jesus produces what I call "mountain top" experiences for the believer.
When I am living close to Jesus and God's plan to make disciples through me, I see God at work around me. I see prayers answered and know it's the Lord's work. I wake up in the middle of the night, sensing that God wants me to pray, or study Scripture, or just be quiet and think about Him. I feel the nudging of God to do something or say something. I am convicted of bad attitudes, bad behavior and bad words. When I have any or all of these experiences, really feeling God's presence, there's a euphoria - a spiritual ecstasy. Spiritual ecstasy is defined this way: A state of consciousness characterized by expanded spiritual awareness, visions or absolute euphoria.

Yep, that's what it is like. For me, that euphoria is just being consumed with Jesus - not for my sake, but to be a missionary to others.

But, it's hard to stay on the mountaintop. It's really hard.

I try to eat well. I eat oatmeal every day for breakfast. I eat at least one salad as a meal each day. I lean more toward chicken than beef. I watch sugar very closely. And, when I'm eating well, I feel great - especially when I'm exercising, too.

And, then one of the boys will make brownies. And, I've never met a bad brownie. Brownies call my name, "Scott, Scott . . . here we are . . . eat all of us . . . with ice cream . . . and chocolate syrup."

And, I say, "I'll get back to the oatmeal and salads tomorrow. Today, I'm eating these dang brownies!"

You and live in a sinful world governed by human nature. Human nature is always going to defer to selfishness and sinfulness. We are surrounded by it in our relationships, media messages, and generations of "me first, me first" thinking. Human nature - sinful to the core - is always pulling us down from the mountaintop. Human nature is diabolically in opposition to following Jesus. Following Jesus is contradictory to human nature, and the pull off the mountain is hard. In the costliness of following Jesus, we get lonely, we get discouraged, we get tired, we get bored, and we worry about how relationships will change when Jesus is inserted in them.

We slide backward. We say things like, "Everyone else is living like they want to live and I'm falling behind" or "I need to stay in the group" or "Everyone is going to feel like I'm judging them." We stop praying. We stop studying Scripture. We stop being around other believers. We go through the motions of church attendance, but the joy and peace from the mountaintop just isn't there anymore. And, Jesus says, "Hey, where did you go?" We hide from Him.

I slide back all the time. So do you. We all do. That's not to justify it or to help you find misery in company. It's just to say, we all slide back. The people of God, in the Old Testament, might as well have been on a roller coaster with God. Look at David, he was up and down, up and down, up and down with God.

But, here's the dealt: Followers of Jesus are convicted by the Holy Spirit to turn away from sin and back to Jesus. Followers of Jesus ache at being off the mountain and crave to be back there. Followers of Jesus repent.

All of this high and low, creates a legitimate question: Can a true Christian slide back?
Absolutely. Sliding back is a regression into a spiritual dullness or lack of obedience. But, sliding back will always bring discipline from God in the same way a parent disciplines a child for being disobedient. Hebrews 12:5-11 says we can be encouraged by God's discipline as a reminder that we are His and He love us. Scripture doesn't spell out how God's discipline applies, but the punishment fits the crime and we never consider it unfair. We know we've done wrong, we see the punishment, and we think, "Yep, I deserved that." Thank goodness for God's correction because it reminds us that we are His!

In the life of Scott Vaughan, discipline usually comes in the form of God's hands being removed from me. That's a human interpretation of how I feel. I slide into the valley of "me" and begin to orchestrate my life according to my own will. I can sense God removing his hands and saying, "You want to be in charge? Have at it." There's a unmistakable cloud that comes, bringing an absence of joy and peace. My life feels out of tune. It's a blindness. Most times, I fall into prayerful repentance like a little boy who has been caught breaking a window in an old barn. (Yep, that happened). But, sometimes, I rebel further and then bad attitudes lead to bad decisions, which begin affecting relationships. Hard-heartedness is just around the corner. Somewhere in there, I will hurt someone I love and the shame of it all drives me into repentance, and hopefully (as I cry out to Jesus) to another mountaintop experience.

My spiritual goal is to narrow the gap between mountain top experiences from year to year. I like to say that I'm a "two steps forward and one step backward" believer who finds joy in gaining one step each year.

Want to read a hopeful story of sliding back and redemption? Read the story of Samson in Judges 13-16. Then, look over at Hebrews 11:32. For all his ups and downs in faith, Samson was ultimately listed with the great men of God.

Here are some practices that will help you and me from sliding back with regularity:

1. Examine your faith life regularly. 2 Corinthians 13:5
2. If you find yourself drifting, turn back to faith immediately. Call a believer. Hebrews 3:12-13.
3. Come to God daily for forgiveness and cleansing. 1 John 1:9 . . . Begin your day with prayer. Prayer before you get out of bed and surrender the complete day to the Lord's work through your life.
4. Come daily seeking the Lord with your whole heart. 1 Chronicles 28:9
5. Stay in Scripture. Keep studying and learning daily. Proverbs 4:13.
6. Stay close to other believers. Hebrews 10:25 . . . Lean into other believers for guidance, encouragement and correction. Have 2-3 believers you can talk to about the deep issues of faith. These are not casual friends, but those who use the name of Jesus.
7. Stand firm in faith. Expect difficult times. Matthew 10:22.
8. Persevere. 1 Timothy 4:15-17.
9. Run the race to win it. 1 Corinthians 9:24-25.
10. Remind yourself of what God has done for you in the past. Hebrews 10:32, 35-39.