When good people have hard hearts

People should be able to see a difference between those who follow Jesus and those who don’t. People should be able to clarify between a "good, Christian person" and a person who follows Jesus. 

Many people - most people actually - are good, honest, hard-working people who vote in all the elections, love their family and friends, attend church regular and prepare chicken casseroles when a friend has fallen ill. But, all of that does not make them a follower of Jesus. It is possible and very much a reality that many, many "good Christian people" do not know Jesus as Savior and many who do aren't following Him.

So, as God leads me into this study of hard heartedness, I want to look closely at "good people with hard hearts." Just as a reminder, hard heartedness does not mean mean or wicked. It means hard or cold to building relationships through which Jesus can be shared.

As many of you know, Vicki’s mama is in very poor health. Mrs. Bowen lived here in Lexington until January, when we moved her to Gainesville, GA where she could live with and be cared for by Vicki's sister, Kathy. Mrs. Bowen loved to cook. A big part of her identity was her cooking. But, as her physical and mental health deteriorated she could no longer cook anything. So, Vicki and were left with Mrs. Bowen's expensive mixers, bowls, pots and pans, and boxes of very good kitchen gadgets.

Vicki and I are good people. We love Jesus, we love our family, we are faithful to the church, we vote in all the elections, we pay our taxes, we work hard, and we don't live on credit - we generally pay cash for everything. But, now comes the question: What should we do with Mrs. Bowen's stuff? For that matter, what should we do with all of the stuff that used to be in our two outdoor sheds? In those sheds, we had some pretty high-quality stuff, including top-of-the-line baby furniture that had survived four boys and could survive four more. What should we do with expensive dresses and suits that we no longer wear? 

Some might say, "Let's have yard sale!" That would allow us to turn stuff into profit. But, who does that serve? Ultimately, self wins.

Some might say, "Let's donate it to a non-profit that resells the items very cheaply." That would be easy. And, it would benefit some . . . but it might not benefit those trying to rub two nickels together to produce dinner.

Jesus would say, "Open your eyes to families in your community and give your life away to those who need the stuff, and give it away with no strings attached." And, so that's what Vicki and I are systematically doing. The baby furniture and accessories have made their way to families experiencing crisis pregnancy, and to young and struggling couples. We've given some of Mrs. Bowen's cooking stuff to young people who are just starting out and need to outfit a kitchen.

The hard-hearted would say, "Oh, no! That's too much trouble. How do you know they really deserve it? How do you know they aren't turning around and selling your stuff at the flea market? That welfare bunch should have to pay something - they have to pay their way!" And, there my friends is the real rub of it. That's why it is so difficult to follow Jesus. Because though we believers live good and honest lives, Jesus says that even the ungodly live good lives. Jesus is calling us to live completely and radically different from the ungodly.

Look at Ephesians 4:17-19. In this passage, Paul makes some very strong statements: "Live no longer like the Gentiles do, for they are hopelessly confused. Their minds are full of darkness; they wander far from the life God gives because they have closed their minds and hardened their hearts against Him. They have no sense of shame. They live for their own pleasure and practice every kind of impurity."

Let me talk to you about traffic. I was in the Chick-fil-a drive through last Monday with what seemed like 500 of my closest friends. It was insane. The Cathy family can make a chicken sandwich, but they can't design buildings and have no concept of traffic flow. I was in Chick-fil-a gridlock hell. An elderly woman had unwittingly parked so that she blocked the drive-through release and was stuck in the drive-through line. She couldn't move. People began blowing their horns and some rolled down their windows and started shouting at her. I sat by the drive-through window, drinking my diet lemonade.

Then, I saw a solution. I got out of the van and approached her. She was white with panic. I told her that I would stop traffic so that she could get out and release the gridlock. All I had to do was stop one car, she pulled out, and everything began working more smoothly. But, as I raised my hand to stop that one car, the driver looked at me in disgust because she didn't understand. Then, she saw what was happening, she smiled, nodded her head in the affirmative and all was well.

Now, here's the thing.

Those who did nothing but blow their horns and yell at the poor lady were hard of heart toward the gospel. I'm sure many of them are really good people 99 percent of the time. A few may know Jesus. But, at that moment, their hearts were hardened to the gospel. They did not value the relationship with the woman as Jesus would have. They valued a chicken sandwich and a hurry-up-to-be-somewhere attitude more than they valued that woman. Their hearts were hard. There's no way they could have been of value to the Kingdom in that moment, and that saddens our Savior.

But, even the nice woman who stopped for me and patiently waited was hard of heart, too. Why? Because even though she stopped when prompted, her heart was hardened not to see the opportunity. I suggest to you that her heart was not as hard as others because she came quickly to tenderness, but she is an example of how easily it is to toggle between good and bad, and how good people can become hard hearted. And in that instance, opportunity for relationship-building is forfeited.

As I was convicted of all this - because I'm guilty, too, for daily moments of hard heartedness - I suddenly found myself in the mindset of allowing anyone and everyone to turn in front of me in traffic. In fact, I spent the rest of the week, stopping for people to turn in front of me in traffic.

The hard of heart would say, "No! It's my turn!"

The hard of heart would say, "I've got somewhere important to be! Out of my way!"

The hard of heart would say, "Scott, I can see helping the old lady at Chick-fil-a, but I can't see letting everyone turn in front of you for an entire week."

Really? What do you think it means when Jesus says in Matthew 16:24:  “Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways (deny your self), take up your cross (take up your own burden) and follow me (because I’m going to take care of you.)” 

You see, we really don't believe that. We believe, "\God takes care of those who care for themselves." Well, hmmm, that phrase is not in Proverbs. That phrase is attributed to Benjamin Franklin, who most likely extracted it from Aesop's Fables.

No, you and I are to be unconcerned for self, completely putting all of our lives, hopes, dreams and goals into the hands of God through the Savior who loves us. And, as we do that, we are to be wide-eyed, open-minded and tender hearted to helping every single person on this planet above self and without prejudice. Do they deserve it? None of us deserves the sacrifice on Calvary, and so let's start there when we talk about what people deserve. When you can't love every single person above self, the end result is a heart that hardens to the gospel.

Do well today by others. You will find that as you do, your heart will become tender to the peace, joy, love and hope of our Savior. As we follow Him completely, in word and attitude and deed, He will massage our hearts to tender places and the answers to life’s questions will become crystal clear. Or, the questions just won't matter. And, that’s where we will go next week.

Confidence in God's power

I was born in that era when doctors gave injections to children rather than worrying over pills that might or might not be taken. And, I've had this lifelong bronchial - sinus thing that caused me to see a doctor a lot when I was a boy. And, the resulting injection of antibiotics was always administered in my butt cheek.

It was humiliating, especially when I got to the age of 7 or 8. It wasn't cool to drop your pants in front of a nurse you might see at church on Sunday. Forced to take a painful injection in the butt added insult to injury.

In the timeline of my life, one particular visit was in 1967. I was almost 8 years old. For months, I had protested receiving the injection in my rear-end, and my mama had assured me that 7 was the magic year in which I could switch from an injection in my hip to an injection in my arm. Thank the Lord.

So, on this particular visit in 1967, at almost 8 years old, I was confident that I would graduate from embarrassment to victory, and receive my injection of penicillin in the arm.

When we arrived at the doctor’s office, I was pleasantly surprised to see – in the waiting room – my Papa Paul – my mama’s daddy. He was there in his trademark white shirt and dark tie – a tall man who walked confidently and spoke authoritatively. To this day, I’m not sure why Papa Paul was at the doctor’s office that day.

But, on this day, I was so glad to see Papa Paul, and he was glad to see me. It gave me strength knowing he was there at the doctor's office, too. My mama began telling him about my ailment, and she continued telling him that I was anxious about getting a shot and mostly about pulling my pants down to receive the shot in the butt.They called him back to see the doctor ahead of me.

He was still back with the doctor when they called me, and mama and I began the slow walk back along the green and white tiled, sterile hallway to a room that smelled of antiseptic and cold metal. Dr. Jim made a quick assessment, told me I was going to get a shot, gave me a cherry Charms pop, and left the room. Soon, the nurse came into the room bearing the instrument of my humiliation. Okay, she said, pull your pants down.

I looked at my mama, and in slow motion, waited on her to rush to my defense. Finally, she half-heartedly said, “He would prefer to have the shot in his arm.” I was so disappointed; I expected my mama to be more forceful than that. And, the nurse dismissed her and said, “It will be better in his hip; pull your pants down son.” I took in a big breath of air, on the verge of tears, and then looked up.

My Papa Paul was standing in the door, and he said, “If that boy wants the shot in his arm, give him the shot in his arm.” For just a minute I thought my mama would protest, but the look the great man gave her reduced her to silence.The nurse looked at my Papa Paul. Tension hung in the air. I quickly buckled my pants and jerked my shirt over my head, thrusting my arm at her and looking away.

The nurse wanted to protest, but my Papa Paul just said, “Hurry up, I have other places to be.” I got my shot in the arm. I didn’t know my Papa Paul very well. He died within months of that experience, and it’s one of only a handful of memories that I can remember. But, I will never forget the swell of confidence that rushed through me, knowing that someone bigger, someone more powerful, someone with authority had stood in the door for me. For the first time in my life, I knew what it was like to know the confident power that comes from a support system.

That support system begins and ends with Almighty God, who is front of us and in our tomorrow, beside us and in our today, and behind us shielding us from the pain of yesterday.

"Jesus looked at them intently and said, "Humanly speaking, it is impossible. But, with God everything is possible." - Matthew 19:26.

God is not a human being. I once heard someone refer to a quarter moon as the "thumb nail of God." I've stared up at a quarter moon, imagining God's thumb nail as the moon and then grasping how God would literally fill the sky if that were true. And, then I remember that God is even larger and mightier and more sovereign than that.

God is heavy - not in a suffocating way - but in a thick and ever-present way. He doesn't sleep. He doesn't nap. He doesn't take a lunch break. He is everywhere in His fullness and all at the same time. He is all-knowing; he is even in the thoughts occurring in the deepest and darkness places of our minds. 

God is with us in our best and brightest moments. He is with us when we stumble and fall. And, He is with us when we are scared, lonely and worried over the future coming at us. God is powerful beyond our ability to comprehend it. Isaiah 40:22: "He sits enthroned above the circle of the Earth, and its people are like grasshoppers. He stretches out the heavens like a canopy, and spreads them out like a tent to live in."

Like a little boy, scared at the doctor's office over an injection and seeing his granddaddy there as powerful support, so is God there with us in everything. And, with God, everything is possible. Nothing that we face - as confident confessors of Jesus Christ - nothing that we face do we face alone. God is already in it, He is already with us, and He is already behind us. God's love, strength and power covers it.

Sure, I was still a sick little boy. I still had to go to the doctor's office. I still had to get a shot, but what an unbelievable feeling of confidence and peace to know someone big and forceful was in my corner. Over and over again, in Joshua 1, God says, "Be strong and courageous because I am with you!" And, in Isaiah 26:3-4, the prophet writes, "You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you! Trust in the Lord always, for the Lord God is the eternal Rock."

Still don't get it? Read Psalm 136. In 26 verses, the Psalmist writes over and over, "God's faithful love endures forever." In those words, I see and feel the God who resurrected his son, Jesus, who had died for all of our sinfulness. In those words, I sense the hammer of God's power, the stomping of His feet as he rushes to our aid, and the jerking away of Satan's confusion that surround us. God never fails us. He never will.

But, as I bump into the pain of life – my own, my family's, and so many others, the thing that people are often missing is the confidence that God is with them. They will ask, "Where is God? Why isn’t God here? Why can’t I feel Him? Why can’t I have that confidence that He is in this storm with me?"

God is there. God is asking a question, too. As you and I ask, "Where is God?" God is asking, "Scott, where are you?" God is asking, "Scott, why can't you plow your life into Scripture and know me better? Why are you so easily blown about by the storms of life? Why can’t you take more seriously your prayer life – and if you don’t understand prayer, get around people who can teach you? Why are on the fringe of faith with others? Why are you so easily led by people who don't confess Jesus?

"Where am I? I am everywhere. Where are you, Scott, in pursuing me?" God will not make us choose Him. We make the choice.

If you are in a measure of pain or you are ministering to someone in pain, I want to encourage you to pursue God. Study your Bible. From one who studies the Bible every week for Sunday School, I can tell you that the more time you spend in Scripture, the more you will lean your life on Scripture. And, the more you lean on Scripture, the more the power of prayer will be revealed to you. God will send other believers into your life for the good times and the hard times. Scripture helps me recognize when God is sending people on His behalf. But, the choice is up to each of us - pursue God or not. Trust God or not. Walk confidently with God or not.

The closer I draw to God, the more I will confidently feel His awesome power and His peace in life's storm.

Fighting jealousy and discontent; finding peace

I am friends with two sisters on Facebook. They have children who appear to be about the same age. They are constantly bickering through Facebook. Now, they don’t verbally do it; they do it through photographs. One will post a photograph of her daughter doing something very special; the other sister will soon after post a photograph of her daughter doing something very special. One will post where her family is going on vacation; the other tries to trump it. This weekend, as the girls moved into college, there was a war of photographs comparing dorm rooms.

Last football season, as Richard finished out his year on the offensive line, I was approached by a parent who said, “I pray that none of these boys ever gets injured, but I realize that my son is just one injury away from getting to play.” Translation: If your boy gets hurt, mine gets to start on Friday nights.

I have told you before about the time we were at a birthday party, and a friend said to me, “My wife is always complaining about our yard and griping because she’s embarrassed of what our neighbors think. When she does that, I just drive her past your house.”

A year after we were married, Vicki and I had some friends who invited us to their house for dinner. The after-dinner entertainment was a one-hour, narrated slide show about their vacation to the Caribbean. When we left their house, we drove in silence for several minutes, contemplating our camping trip to a local state park. Finally I said, “I hate the Caribbean.” And, we laughed all the way home. I wanted to ride back by their house and just give them the finger on the drive-by.

We get restless don’t we? And, we compare ourselves to others, don’t we? Why is this happening to me and not you? Why do you have and I don’t have? Why are your children over-achievers and mine don’t seem to care about today, much less tomorrow? Why am I having to care for my parents day-and-night? Why do I worry all the time? Why do we bicker all the time within our family? Why does life seem so easy for you and so difficult for me? Why do I feel jealous? Why do you seem so jealous? Why is your life so perfect? Why does my life stink?

I want to tell you something. No one’s life is perfect. None is righteous; no, not one. (Romans 3:10) Or, how about Romans 3:23: "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." 1 Peter 5:10 says that only Jesus will eternally put us on a firm foundation. So, get this straight: No one is perfect. Not me, not you and not them; not anyone. No one's life is perfect. Don’t get into comparisons. I remember the story of Miss Kate, in Jesup, Ga., whose husband died without life insurance, whose children were all addicts, and whose house burned completely to the ground, leaving her a stranger living in a friend’s basement. Someone said, “Oh, Miss Kate, if only you could trade your life with someone else.” And, she said, “I would not trade my problems for anyone’s problems. I know my problems. Behind the mask, their problems may be worse than my own, and I know through my Savior that all my problems are just temporary anyway."

Today’s lesson is a reminder to find contentment with where you are. And, I want to use Philippians 4. In this passage, Paul is writing to the church at Phillipi, and he opens with instruction for two women who are bickering with one another. We don’t know why they are bickering, but let’s assume they are comparing children, or comparing homes, or comparing cornbread recipes. Maybe they are fussing over who is more prominent within the church. Maybe they are squabbling over theology. Whatever it is, I like to think they are comparing lives and opinions, and that leads to envy and jealousy.

Paul reminds them that (a) they both belong to the Lord; and (b) they must settle their disagreement (they can’t be in true fellowship with God, as believers, if they are ugly to one another). Paul says to the rest of the church that friends shouldn’t sit on the sidelines, but should be involved in bringing peace to these women. Because all the energy should be on matters of faith – not jealousy or envy or feeling sorry for yourself or comparing yourself to others.
And, knowing that we all share times and feelings of discontent, of comparing ourselves to others, of restlessness, or jealousy and envy, Paul gives us some very encouraging words in the rich, rich Scripture of Philippians 4:1-8.

1. "Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again – Rejoice!" What? ? Are you crazy, Paul? In times of being angry and dispirited, I am supposed to be joyful? Yes. Consider that when Paul wrote this he was in prison - so he practiced what he preached.. Paul is saying that our inner attitudes should not be dependent on our outer circumstances, because no matter where we are – Jesus is with us. My son, Andrew, had a tough week this week. As he pulled out of the funk, he wrote, “When, I look in the rear view mirror of my life, I can see how God was with me in the times of joy and sorrow, and years from now when I look in the rear view mirror, I will see what I know is true – God is with me now.” This past week, even in tough circumstances, my boy did not let it change his inner perspective.
2. "Let everyone see that you are considerate in all that you do. Remember the Lord is coming soon." The most important thing you and I can do is protect our witness, and when we slink into the darkness of despair, envy, jealousy, and discontent it becomes very difficult to fully reflect the love we have for Jesus. In fact, I believe a person's spiritual growth is evidenced by how much they wallow in negatively, envy, jealousy and bitterness. We can’t get caught up in petty revenge and ugliness – it reflects that we really don’t love Jesus like we claim to love Him. And, others see that false witness we project. And, He is coming soon, and the world must know Him or be lost forever. We have to keep on mission despite the swirl around us.
3. You know this beautiful verse (v. 6): "Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done. If you do this, you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful that the human can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus." Many have delivered college-age children to schools this weekend, saying good-bye in very real ways to childhood. And, I don’t care who you are – when they leave home (even for college) there is worry, and there is some personal pain over the reshuffling of the family deck and its relationships. And, I know many of you are worried about your jobs, and most all of us are worried about the economy’s toll on our lives now and in the future, when we attempt to retire. But, Paul says, “Worry about nothing.” In fact, every time you feel the need to worry – turn that worry into prayer. Middle of the night? Don't take sleeping medicine; Get up and pray. The more you pray – the less you will worry. Philippians 4:7 says, “If you do this – pray over worry – you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus." One more thing – Yes, God knows our problems without our prayers, but He wants us to come talk to Him about them. And, that’s what prayer is – talking to God about the concerns of our lives. He will listen, and is on call for us 24/7. No conversation with God is too small; if it troubles you and me – it troubles Him. True peace is not found in positive thinking, in the absence of conflict or in good feelings. True peace comes from knowing that God is in control.
4. Fix your thoughts on what is true, honorable and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. What goes into your life will come out through your life. Each of us should take time to self-evaluate what we are putting into our lives. For me, I have moved away from the network sitcoms and reality shows to old movies on Turner Classic Movies. I have also replaced television with good books – good fiction, biographies, and the occasional devotion book. You may be at place where you need to reshuffle the deck of your friendships, especially if you can’t say ‘no’ to some of the places those friends are taking you. If you are distracted easily, like me, pray for God to keep you so busy in day-to-day service to others that you are too exhausted to do anything but sleep at the end of the day. Focus on the honorable and right; expect Jesus to come right now and find you honorable.

Mostly, today, I want you to know that it’s sinful to compare yourself to others, and put people in positions of comparing themselves to you. Live the life that God has given you, put all of your trust in His plans for you, and fully love and serve anyone and everyone He sends to you. In that, you will find peace in all of these very temporary circumstances.

Life's Dark Valleys

In Psalm 23, David, on the run for his life and in a dark place personally, cries out, (v. 1) “The Lord is my shepherd; I have everything I need” and (v. 4) “Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me.” NLT.

We are guaranteed of walking through dark valleys in this life. They come relationally, they come financially, they come physically, and they come spiritually. Often, they intertwine with one another to be even darker. Financial pain can lead to relational pain, and often to physical pain. We can even begin to question faith through it all.

But, we see David’s reminder that the Lord is with us, and that is all we need in the dark valleys of our lives. And, David reminds us that we are walking *through* dark valleys – that there is an end to them. And, that as we walk through the valleys, we can do so without fear because God is close beside us . . . and He (and He alone) has the flashlight.

Here are six things to remember about your journey through the dark valleys:

• Dark valleys are guaranteed and they come to all of us. They are a byproduct of our sinful world, and none of us are immune to them. Some will be short, some long, some really bad, and some not so bad. A benefit of daily, personal spiritual growth through prayer, Bible study and the fellowship of believers is that we will be spiritually prepared for the dark valleys when they come.
• God is always with us as we walk through the darkness. For those who know Jesus, God is always with us. He will not abandon us. One way that God walks with us is through the fellowship of believers like our Sunday School class and church. Stay close to other believers; we are family – brothers and sisters in Christ.
•  God permits the dark valleys and uses them to shape us into what He wants us to do according to His purpose for us. Why in the world would a God who loves us allow dark valleys to occur? Because He uses those dark valleys to teach us, to break us, and to mold us into the people He needs us to be according to His purpose for us. The Bible is full of men and women who went through dark valleys to learn of God and to do great things for Him!
• We will stay in the dark valley as long as we resist God’s leading in our lives. God will use the dark valley until we are broken to His will for us. A dear friend of mine was a very successful banker, but was miserable in it. He finally came to a broken place, where he surrendered to God’s plan for Him. Today, he grooms and cares for small animals and has used that little business to share Jesus, minister to families, and help people immeasurably. He has never been more at peace.
• There is an end to the darkness, but that end may be eternity with Jesus. We are guaranteed eternity with Jesus, and so regardless of the dark valleys we face or the number of them that we face, ultimately we escape the darkness of this world completely.

6.      God wants us to share in the light what we learned in the darkness. Matthew 5:15-16 reminds us to let our light shine as a praise to our heavenly father. I would love for some of you to share – even briefly – on Sunday mornings about your dark valleys and the lessons of faith and hope you learned there. That could be a great testimony to others! I’ll bring the tissue.

Revenge

We are a society that loves revenge and loves pay back.

Oh, yes, we do. We even have a new Prime Time television show this fall titled, “Revenge.”

I love the Clint Eastwood movie, “Unforgiven.” Clint plays a retired outlaw, who goes with a friend (played by Morgan Freeman), to avenge a brutality against a small group of prostitutes in a small Western town. The women are contracting with Clint to bring revenge to the men who hurt one of them. At the film’s height, Freeman’s character is murdered, opening the door for Clint’s character to exact significant revenge upon all the bad men in the town. The movie won the Academy Award for Best Picture. Clint won Best Actor; Gene Hackman, as the worst of the bad men, won Best Supporting Actor. The film also received an Academy Award for Best Editing. It’s a revenge movie – applauding revenge for crimes against women and crimes against best friends. Who in the world wouldn’t applaud that? And, millions of Americans did. The American Film Institute regards it as one of the top 100 movies of all time, and in the top 5 of Westerns. We just love to exact revenge and to see bad things happen to others who do us wrong.

In my 30s, I made the mistake of going into business with a good friend. We were just getting the business off the ground, when life dealt his career and marriage a significant blow. Wrought with this stress and depression, he walked away from our business, leaving me a few thousand dollars of capital debt to pay off. He also sold some of the equipment for quick cash. To make things worse, our business plan put operating the business in his lap. I had no interest in operating the business alone. When I tried to approach him about this folly I suddenly inherited, he began ignoring my telephone calls and refusing to answer his door. I got an attorney – not because I needed one. I got an attorney because I wanted one; I wanted to exact some revenge for the wrong that I had been done.