My Jesus: Moving Beyond Regrets

I've been with people in the last hours of their lives.
I've been with people who were in those last hours and were still cognitive enough to talk with clarity. Many people approach those final moments with lots of regret.

• "I wish I had not worked so hard. I worked to have things that I didn't need and to impress others who didn't even like me. I should have spent more time with my spouse and children, my parents and my siblings, and my friends."
• "I wish I had expressed my feelings more. I should have told people that I loved them, and that I appreciated them, and that I hoped for the best for them."
• I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends, especially those from my youth. I should have been a better friend; dying should not be the thing that pulls old friends together."

Sad, how death stirs the regrets in us.

And, yet, death can come at any second - at any moment. Ecclesiastes 12:7 reminds us of the hard truth about death, "and the dust returns to the ground it came from, and the spirit returns to God who gave it." Each of us will one day be like dust, but our spirits will remain. For those who know Jesus as the Savior from sin, our spirit will be alive in the New Jerusalem; for those who do not know Jesus as the Savior from sin, the spirit will return to God for His eternal punishment upon it.

Knowing that death is imminent, there should be an urgency to take seriously the living of our lives and to avoid regrets. How do we avoid regrets? Well, we must make amends and apologize where we have hurt others. We must take ownership of poor decisions, and consequences and live forward. 

Easier said than done, right?

I don't lay awake at night regretting money I've not made. I've had enough. I don't regret the homes I might have owned. I've had a roof over my head and a comfortable rocking chair. I don't regret the places I might have gone. I've seen a lot of cool places and I'm content. But, despite taking apologizing to people I've hurt and despite taking ownership of poor decisions, I still find myself living in moments of regret. I regret not living a live that was completely devoted to following Jesus. I regret the 20 years or so that I I thought I followed Jesus, but did not reflect Him in kindness, thoughtfulness, forbearance and attitude. I regret - even moments today - failing to give more of myself away as Jesus did for me.

Satan is in the regret business. He uses regrets to draw us further from Jesus, and to draw us further from friends in faith through the local church. Satan loves to hold up the mirror, point to our reflection and whisper:

• "You aren't worthy."
• "You are a failure."
• "You have been away from church for so long - they will whisper about you when you go back."
• "It's too late to mend bridges with people."

And, Satan loves to move hateful, cynical people into our lives to remind us of our failures, our shortcomings, and poor decisions. He loves to get us looking in mirrors, and he loves when those hateful people hold up the mirrors for us.

Sadly, all of us live with regrets - even when we know they are forgiven. We haven't really forgiven ourselves. And, all of us are easily led into holding up mirrors for others. We do it under the disguise of giving constructive criticism, or counsel, or even - hack, hack - Biblical counseling.

When I consider "My Jesus," the Jesus that I love and the Jesus that I hear and the Jesus that walks with me, I think first about the story from John 8:1-12. I even love the mystery surrounding this passage. It doesn't appear in the ancient Greet manuscripts, but it does appear in most Bible translations, including the King James. It's generally believed that John didn't write this (it sometimes has appeared in Luke), but because it's about Jesus and forgiveness, it mostly appears in John. It's just this "mystery" that makes it so wonderful to me.

Read John 8:1-12. Do you see how the "mirror holders" had gathered around this woman? Do you see how Jesus came alongside her sinfulness? Do you see how Jesus "sent a message" to the mirror holders, and how they faded away in the fullness of Jesus message? Do you see how the woman recognized Jesus as "Lord"? Do you see how Jesus avoid condemning the woman? (Remember, Jesus came to save the world and not condemn it). Do you see how Jesus instructed the woman to turn from her sin and live forward? No regrets.

I love this story.

I've hurt people with my words and my actions. And, I regret it deeply. And, I've tried to seek people our and make amends. Still, when I wrestle with regret, Jesus steps in and says, "Regret no more the days of yesterday, Scott. Live forward in faith. Put an X on the sin of yesterday, live forward and sin no more." That message is why I love my Jesus so very, very much.

• If you have regrets today, Jesus says “Live forward; sin no more” as you walk in faith with Him.
• If you have things that need to be said to others, get them said today, tomorrow, this week.Get those words said with a sense of urgency.
• If you are holding a mirror up to others, trying to shape them into your image rather than God’s image for them, I warn you: You are arm-in-arm with Satan – not with Jesus. If you are throwing rocks at people, the words in the sand are for you. Be very afraid.
• If you have lived through the regrets and now live in peace, be an encourager to others. Turn people to the comfort of Jesus and the faith family of other believers.