Love Lifted Me - Easter 2013

Psalms 40:2 - "He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along."

God is perfect in every way. Deuteronomy 3:24 reads “God is the rock. His works are perfect, and His ways are just. He is a faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just.”

Paul reminds us in Romans 3:23 of the wide chasm that exists between God and us:  “For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard.”

What separates us from God is our sinfulness - our selfishness.
I chuckle sometimes at how ridiculous we are as human beings (self included!). We get so over-consumed with the manifestations of sin. We look at people who consume alcohol and we say, "You are a sinner." We at look at those involved in sexual sin, and we point fingers and say, "You are a sinner." We look at people who are not in church regularly and we say, "You are a sinner." We look at those who are hostile, angry, jealous, prideful (won't ask for help - even prayer support), bitter, divisive, envious and we say, "Sin, sin, sin, sin, sin."
I chuckle at all of this because we are all sinners. We all sin. We all sin all the time. We all fall short of God's glorious standard.

Sin is so easy. Last night, we were coloring Easter eggs. Vicki had bought plastic coloring cups because she and Matthew use a cold-water coloring method. I like to go old-school, using food coloring and hot water. Without thinking, I poured the first cup of hot water in a plastic cup. I watched helplessly as the cup melted and the red dye flooded across the counter and onto the floor. What came from my mouth - even in whispers - was not pretty. And, I don't know why I thought my blunder was Vicki's fault, but I lobbed a sarcastic comment in her direction. Vicki is not easily offended, but when she is offended she takes time getting past it. And, so she stewed over my reaction for hours. Both of us sinned. There was no right or wrong in either of our actions or reactions.

And, if it's so very easy to slip into sin over the coloring of eggs, how easy must it be for me to sin each day and every day?

There's no way around it. We all sin. Sin, at its root, is the breaking of God's law to love Him and to love others without condition and prejudice. It's putting love of self above love of God and others. To love God means we put Him first in our lives and we submit to His plans for us - not our own plans. We completely love others above self in all things. All things. Self love (sin) oozes from us in our attitudes, actions, words, and body language.

Sin is looking out for Number One, and putting Number One above all others. We are born into this condition. It's called "Human Nature." Human Nature is simply the natural drive toward living a good Earthly life by Earthly standards. As good as that sounds, it is sinful because it always puts "self" ahead of others. It lives by Earthly rules rather than Godly rules. Human Nature cries out, "I want and I need (fill in the blank)." I catch myself asking college students, "What do you want to do after school?" when the question should be, "What does God want to do through your life after school?" See the difference?

Sin is intoxicating. The more we focus on "self" instead of God and others, the easier sin becomes. And, yes, there are rewards. And, those rewards are intoxicating. The rewards - financial, influential, physical - they feed our love of self. And, soon, we are living life completely for the advancement of self. Deep within us, we temper this love of self with an occasional donation - even a big one - to the church or a charitable cause. We can even serve a charitable cause, but this salve does not really cover our sinful nature. In fact, many give only to love the fact that they give. That is sinful. There's honestly no escaping it.

Matthew and I are cleaning out the old shed and moving stuff into the new shed. I told him that he would learn some things about me in the process, especially as we go through the old trunks that I have from high school and college. These old trunks are full of memorabilia and collectibles from my youth. I haven't peered in them or gone through them in decades. Now, with the shed project, it's time to sort through all the mess and purge some of it. I told Matthew, "Some of what we find may tarnish your image of me." He said, "But, you weren't a bad person." And, I said, "No, but I was living for me and me alone. I was living deep in sin - far from God. I was living for what life could give me. And, I wanted a lot."

Sin pulls us to look in the mirror and see only ourselves (and I extend that to our children, too - all that is mine). The problem is that self can never satisfy. How many times have you ever saved for a purchase, bought the item, and then immediately regretted it? Sure you have. It's because the feeding of self never satisfies. You can't have a house big enough to make you happy. You can't have enough clothes to make you happy. You can't go on enough trips to make you happy. You can't lose enough weight to make you happy. There aren't enough promotions to make you happy. At the gym, I see young women on a quest to be "beautiful." But, they are so thin that they look ancient. They are desperately feeding "self" and dying in the process. Sin is addictive.

The hymn "Love Lifted Me" by James Rowe (words) and Howard Smith (music) includes these words, "I was sinking deep in sin far from the peaceful shore, very deeply stained within, sinking to rise no more."

Selfishness becomes a weight that drags us deeper and deeper into it.

Sin dehydrates us. It robs us of peace. I constantly hear people say things like, "I'm tired all the time" or "I can't sleep" or "I'm so weary" or "I'm so lonely" or "I'm so bored" or "I'm so angry" or "My life sucks" or "I need a friend" or "I just wish I could have one peaceful day." Friends, I have been there - so weary from "self" that self is all I can think about. I just put my head on the pillow and cried out, "Peace." This love of self is a chase that never ends and is never fulfilling. Sin robs us of peace because we’re always chasing something for self. It robs us of hope because we can’t see an end to the rat race and the stress. It robs us of love because we realize the person in the mirror can’t love us back, can’t hug us, can’t hold our hand, can’t console our tears. Sin is lonely. Sin is tired. Sin is depressed. Sin is sleepless. Sin is angry.

But, the hymn reminds us, "But, the Master of the sea heard my despairing cry, from the waters lifted me, now safe am I. Love lifted me! Love lifted me! When nothing else could help, Love lifted me!"

Whose love? God's love. God looks down on our sinfulness and says, "I love you more than you love yourself. And, I want to free you from that self-bondage." And, He sent Jesus as our rescuer, our Savior from sin. And, Jesus calls us back to the purpose of life: Love God, and love others, and help others discover Jesus as Savior. Pour your life into God and into others and watch how peaceful, hopeful and loving your own life becomes. Turn from the mirror of self and sin, and look out the window to see God at work and the struggle of others - without prejudice. What would your day be like if you did nothing for self or with selfish motivation? What would your day look like if you used your workplace, your home, your errands to pour into others in the name of Jesus? I believe you would find a blessing beyond words.

Jesus and Jesus alone is the only way to escape the sinful bondage of Human Nature. Those who acknowledge their sinful nature, turn from it to recognize Jesus as their own only Hope from sin, will be restored with God - through Jesus - for all eternity. Jesus says, in Matthew 11:28, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” Jesus’ sacrifice provides salvation from the bondage of sin, and restores those who believe in Him with Almighty God and God’s plan for us. Paul writes in Romans 12:2, “Restoration will allow us to discern the will of God, what is acceptable to Him and perfect for us.”

Love lifted me! Jesus lifted me! Amen.

The Narrow Gate

In Matthew 7:22, we read the words of Jesus, "Not everyone who calls out to me, 'Lord, Lord!' will enter the Kingdom of heaven. Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter. On judgment day many will say to me, 'Lord! Lord! we prophesied in your name and cast out demons in your name and performed many miracles in your name.' But, I will reply, 'I never knew you. Get away from me, you who break God's laws.'

Every human being on this planet was and is and will be born without salvation from sin. Please understand that. All of us are born sinful and live our lives in sin. We die as sinners. We are born on a road with hell - a real place and an eternal separation from God - as our deserved destination. God loves us, He is with us, but, outside of faith in Jesus, God has no relationship with us because we are 'born in sin' and he is sinless. (John 14:6 - Jesus says, "No one can come to the Father except through me.) Knowing that we are born with hell as our eternal destination helps us understand what we read in John 3:17, "God sent His son into the world not to judge the world, but to save the world through him."

There is not one thing that you and I can do that will make hell more of a destination. We were born ticketed to that destination. It's ridiculous then to lower ourselves to the judging of others' sinfulness except between believers and in a spirit of protection and love for that person. (If my close friend is beginning to flirt with women outside his marriage, I'm going to confront him for his own good and because I love him). Likewise, there is not one thing that you and I can do to save ourselves from hell as a destination. In the Scripture passage, above, from Matthew 7, Jesus says people will claim they did great things in the name of spirituality, but none of it saved them.

Because God loves us, despite our sinfulness, and desires a relationship with each of us, He provides an escape - salvation - from our road to destruction. He sent his son, Jesus, to die as a substitute for each of us. Jesus bore each of our sins, died on the cross with them, was cleansed of them, and rose again to join God in heaven. Those who believe that Jesus made this sacrifice will be filled with the Holy Spirit for daily guidance, and be restored to a relationship with God. These believers will die and God will not see their sin - God will see Jesus and pardon the individual. That's the gospel presented by the apostle John in John 3:16.

Only Jesus saves. Only Jesus. None but Jesus.

In Luke 18:16, Jesus says, "Then Jesus called for the children and said to his disciples, "Let the children come to me. Don't stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn't receive the Kingdom of God like a child (acceptance, faith, trust, and innocence) will never enter it." It takes a child's faith to respond to Jesus. That's why adults have such a struggle coming to Jesus. Adults try to logically figure it out. But, we aren't God. We must acknowledge that we need Jesus, that we have a void in our innermost being that nothing of this Earth can fill, and that only Jesus can fill that void. We acknowledge Jesus and respond - we let go of what the world calls logical. The world is a deceitful place.

Jesus tells us that most people can't or won't accept Him as their Savior.

Many of the people that I know will not be with me in heaven. That's not an indictment of their lifestyle because all of us are sinful. It's just that I know, from the words of Jesus, that only a few will enter the Kingdom. The indictment is on me to be bold in my faith and point people toward salvation. And, that indictment eats at me day and night, night and day. Who is coming to Jesus because of my life? Because of your life?

It's uncomfortable and messy to believe that many of the people I know will not be in heaven. We like to think of our comfortable little Bible Belt, where people gather in churches, have lunch afterward with mama, sign up children for Vacation Bible School, read devotion books, and revere Billy Graham. We like to think that everyone on our left and right will be with us in heaven, but the opposite is true. The question is not whether people are good or bad because many of the lost are really good people. But, being a good person doesn't lead to eternity with God - only a confessed faith in Jesus does that. If being a good person was all that's important to salvation, we could buy our salvation and that's not Biblical.

My studies and travels lead me to believe that people fall into three very loose categories:

1. The carnal lost. Those that have completely turned from faith, and have rejected it.
2. The Cultural (Carnal or Consumer) Christian. Those who believe they do the right things that "Christians are supposed to do" and by default they are saved. These people - regardless of what they do in the name of church or religiosity - are not saved. 
3. The Conversion Christian. Those who can and do publicly confess, "I love Jesus; my life stands for Jesus, and nothing else in my life matters when compared to Jesus."

The overwhelming majority of people who have lived, live today and will live tomorrow fall into categories One and Two. Jesus says in Matthew 7:13, “You can only enter God’s Kingdom through the narrow gate. The highway to hell is broad and its gate is wide for the many who choose the easy way. But the gateway to life is small, and the road is narrow, and only a few ever find it.” How much is a few? Well, it's not a majority. A few, in the great scheme of the universe, isn't very many.

What does a Conversion Christian look like? They will have or long to have these attributes.

• There is a confessing love of Jesus, an acknowledgment of personal sinfulness and that only a faith in Jesus covers sin in the presence of Almighty God. There is an understanding that life is worth living only because Jesus lives. (Mark 8:38)
• There is an accepting that following Jesus is costly and painful to this human existence. Every believer that I know has suffered in this Earthly life because of a faith in Jesus. It is ridiculous to believe Jesus died on the cross and that we can follow Him without suffering. A believer will lose friends, lose customers, be at odds with family, be cut from the team, have children cut from the team, be laughed at, ridiculed, and struck down by this world and its forces of evil. (Matthew 5:10-12)
• There is a hunger to produce other disciples. Following Jesus is not a precious gift we lock away in a safe for our own admiration. There is a hunger to have eyes and arms wide open for people who need Jesus, and to point them toward the cross. I believe the Conversion Christian grows to a place, where he or she no longer sees people, but sees souls who need to know Jesus. Following Jesus is about "going and doing" with intention. (Matthew 28:19)
• There is a desire to be "workers" in a fellowship community - the church. There is a seriousness to the place of church in God's plan and in our lives. (Acts 2:41-47)
• There is an understanding that Salvation is not a transaction, but a conversion.It involves change. We are literally new creations manifested by repentance, love and obedience toward God and our neighbors. (James 2:14-26). To believe otherwise is to believe in a cheap grace. Salvation occurs within the heart; not within the trappings of church-based protocol or rituals.

You can see why the number are few, can't you? You can see why many buy into the deceit of the Cultural Christian that salvation can be purchased only by doing good things, connecting to a church, knowing some Scripture, attending prayer breakfasts, giving money and using influence for good, and making baptisms and confirmation classes synonymous with salvation? It's a wide gate. Some will even quote John's vision in Revelation 7 of the "multitude" in heaven, and use that to dismiss the Narrow Gate. Yes, many will be in heaven; but, still that number will only represent a few of all humanity that has ever and will ever live. Don't be deceived by the wide road. We see a lot of people on this wide road, and it feels comfortable. It's even fun. We can join the herd and be content - never even calling on the name of Jesus. But, Jesus provides the painful reminder of The Narrow Gate. Nothing about faith is ever really comfortable.

Many who read this will be confronted with the reality of Jesus' position in their lives. Non-existent, a cultural icon, or a personal Savior. For those who have not confessed Jesus as their Savior from sin, I invite you to contact me at scott@svministry.com. I invite you to attend our Sunday morning class, The V Class, at Lexington Baptist Church. God has put on my heart the need to share the gospel every week, and to stand with other believers in making disciples. We don't have it all figured out; we need others to be on the journey with us. We invite you to join with Jesus, and then join with us.

For those who are Conversion Christians, I need to speak with you here.
We can no longer assume that everyone is saved from sin by the blood of Jesus. We must assume that everyone is lost - continuing from birth on that broad road to an eternity without God. We must ache for people, not judging them, but judging ourselves. If you are a teacher, the classroom and the families behind the students become souls who need to know a Savior. If you are in sales, the customers become souls who need to know a Savior reflected through you. If you are a mechanic, a banker, a doctor, a lawyer, a coach, a dad, a mom, an aunt, an uncle, a grandmother, a grandfather, a brother, or a sister - all who come in and out of your life are souls, needing to hear about Jesus from you. This is not the pastor's job. This is not the Sunday School teacher's job. This is not the church's job.

As a Conversion Christian, this is the holy order you have been given: Make disciples, baptizing them, and teaching them about Jesus. Our holy order is to see people loosened from this world's values and knotted to faith in a risen Savior. As Christian soldiers, the Holy Spirit will teach us when to be bold and when to work in stealth.

We may not trumpet Jesus on every street corner, but we can pray daily this way, "Lord, put one person in my path today - one person - and then the courage to tell them, 'I love Jesus and I want you to know my Jesus.' Give me this divine appointment, Lord, knowing that you will give me the exact words to say."

Maybe you feel this burning inside you to stand up for Jesus, but you just don't feel equipped. No church ever equipped you. That's the future chapter of our Sunday School class. We are going to equip people who want to testify for Jesus, knowing that the Cultural Christians will be converted or slip away. I pledge to you that I will stand with you, and we will learn together. I've not yet fully arrived myself and that is not a false modesty. I am still growing as a follower of Jesus. I will not be fully made until I see my Savior in eternity. My life's calling is to share Jesus with others and to help others share their own faith.

Friends, this is what we call the Weight of God. It's heavy business that is uncomfortable.
You and I live a life that will end with judgement. This world is a temporary place for temporary bodies.
There is an eternal, supernatural world going on all around us and it's in our future. There is no denying it. There is no escaping it. There is no prolonging it. It is here, it is now and it is forever.

You and I were born separated from a God who loves us, and wants a wonderful unimaginable eternity with each of us. He sent his son, Jesus, to die for our sinfulness and restore us to God's love. Few accept this gift. Most don't. Some become deceived that they have when they haven't. None of us have the vision to see a person's deepest relationship with Jesus, but each of us - to the core - knows the truth of our salvation. Only the few will enter the Narrow Gate. Please be in that number. If you are among the few, please join me - though imperfect and sinful - in pointing others to the arms of our sweet, sweet Savior.

Jesus. Name above all Names.

           

             

Be, Know and Do

By John Wright

If you are going to teach, it’s usually good to teach a subject that you know something about. So at the very least, this lesson should discuss something that I should know a little something about. For those of you that don’t know, the Army and God’s will brought my family here to South Carolina. For the past 2 and ½ years, I have had the awesome privilege of teaching leadership classes at USC’s Army ROTC Department.

In the Army, our leadership doctrine identifies 16 leadership competencies. They are all listed on a form that we call a “Blue Card” which is used to evaluate a Cadet on his or her leadership abilities. On the top of the Blue Card are our values, our absolutes if you will, Loyalty, Duty, Respect, Selfless Service, Honor, Integrity, and Personal Courage. Then on the bottom are the leadership competencies. They include such things as physical fitness, resiliency, interpersonal tact, communication skills, and leading by example. These competencies are further organized into a model based on all these attributes being things that a leader should Be, Know or Do. I believe that Jesus was the greatest leader that ever lived and fully exemplified the Be, Know, and Do model.

So, let’s begin with “Be”. In my opinion, there is no greater example of being as a leader as God coming to earth as a man in the person of Jesus. In Philippians 2, Paul explains it so beautifully and I like how it is translated in the New Living Bible

3 Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. 4 Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.5 You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.6 Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. 7 Instead, he gave up his divine privileges he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being.
When he appeared in human form he humbled himself in obedience to God
and died a criminal’s death on a cross

The great singer and songwriter, Rich Mullins, the man who wrote Christian classics like “Awesome God” and “Step by Step”, never performed or recorded what I think was his most profound song. The song was titled “A Man of No Reputation” and was inspired by this passage. Mullins could never perform it because when he thought about the level of humility that Christ brought on himself out of love for us, he didn’t think he could keep his composure. Fortunately, this song was recorded after Rich’s death and I recommend that you listen to it some time. Just have some Kleenex handy.

Recently, Pastor Mike preached yet another of his great sermons .The subject was Jesus and the woman at the well. One of the things that strike me about this story is just how the humanity of Jesus is displayed. As a quick recap, Jesus chose to travel through Samaria, a region of the area inhabited by a group of people that were despised by the Jews. In fact, any self-respecting Jew at that time would not have been caught dead in Samaria. So here’s Jesus in Samaria, sitting beside a well when a woman walks up. And this is how John recounts the story in Chapter 4:

7 When a Samaritan woman came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “Will you give me a drink?” 8 (His disciples had gone into the town to buy food.)9 The Samaritan woman said to him, “You are a Jew and I am a Samaritan woman. How can you ask me for a drink?” (For Jews do not associate with Samaritans. (NIV)

Now, let’s think about this. “Will you give me a drink?” Compare this passage with Genesis 1:

6 And God said, “Let there be a vault between the waters to separate water from water.” 7 So God made the vault and separated the water under the vault from the water above it. And it was so. 8 God called the vault “sky.” And there was evening, and there was morning—the second day.9 And God said, “Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear.” And it was so. 10 God called the dry ground “land,” and the gathered waters he called “seas.” And God saw that it was good. (NIV)


So, why was the creator of all water, earth, and sky lowering himself to ask this half-breed, tramp, Samaritan woman to give him a drink? And I truly believe that he was thirsty because if you remember that one of the things that he cried down from the cross was; “I thirst.” It’s very simple. Jesus was “being” and a huge part of being is getting your hands dirty, making yourself uncomfortable, not worrying about the opinions of others and building relationships. That’s why Jesus asked this woman for a drink of water because he was getting ready to change her life. So how are we doing with being? If you are we are in a position of leadership, do we merely see those that we supervise as tools to use to check things off our list and further our own selves. Is the homeless person holding a cardboard sign at the interstate on-ramp an indicator of the deplorable situation in this nation that “someone” needs to do “something” about or, instead, is he an opportunity given straight from the hand of God to pour part of ourselves into someone else?

Now let’s discuss knowing. Have you ever been in a bookstore and seen all the books about leadership and management? Many of these books will tell you that an effective leader needs to clearly communicate their vision to their organization. In the 22nd Chapter of his gospel, Matthew says this:

35 One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: 36 “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’[c] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[d] 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” (NIV)

Pretty eloquent for a homeless man with no formal education who grew up blue-collar in a hick town, huh?

We must remember that Jesus knew and used the scriptures.
The Ten Commandments on at least 4 separate occasions, Leviticus, Isaiah, Psalms, when face-to-face with Satan himself, those are just a few of the over 40 occasions that Jesus quotes what we would now call the Old Testament in the four gospels.
It doesn’t surprise me that this series “The Bible” on History Channel is doing so well. People are thirsty to know the word and nature of our wonderful Heavenly Father. Check out this amazing illustration. Pick up a bible, put your finger on the account of Adam and Eve’s sin. Now notice how much more there is in the Bible between that account in Genesis and the end of Revelation. In those pages there are many characters and stories, but from that incident in the Garden of Eden the Bible is really all about Jesus. It’s all about God’s desire to love us his children and have a relationship with us. So how are we doing with the attribute of knowing? Do we live 1 Peter 3:15 that says:

15 But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. (NIV)

OK, now for the final attribute of doing. A trait that most effective leaders have is charisma. How’s this for an amazing illustration of charismatic leadership:

18 As Jesus was walking beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon called Peter and his brother Andrew. They were casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. 19 “Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people.” 20 At once they left their nets and followed him.21 Going on from there, he saw two other brothers, James son of Zebedee and his brother John. They were in a boat with their father Zebedee, preparing their nets. Jesus called them, 22 and immediately they left the boat and their father and followed him. Matthew (NIV)

Wow, now that’s making a first impression! I know that the Bible is perfect and God has ordained what is in the scriptures but wouldn’t you love to know what was going through those four men’s minds right then? What made them decide to drop everything and to follow Jesus? I often tell my students that they will never be good leaders unless they learn to be great followers. Right now, in our men’s Bible Study (MOVERS ) we are studying the book “Multiply” by Francis Chan (I knew that I could find a way to get a shameless plug in here). The cornerstone scripture of this book is this:
16 Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. 17 When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. 18 Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew (NIV)

Of course, we know this passage as the Great Commission, not the Great Recommendation, or the Great List of Really Good Suggestions. And, if that doesn’t make you wiggle in your seat a little, check this out:

34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, 36 I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.’37 “Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? 39 When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ Matthew (NIV)

I’m not making any of this up. I’m just trying to move the plank in my eye enough that I can see my Bible and share some scripture. You see, it doesn’t matter if you are a teacher, manager, coach, mom, or dad, if your identity is based in your relationship with God Almighty through his son, Jesus, you are a leader. Therefore, Jesus is the perfect role model for any leader. Furthermore this is what Bible says about our commissioning as leaders.

(all from the NIV)
Exodus 19:6
6 you[a] will be for me a kingdom of priests and a holy nation.’

John 1: 12-13
2 Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God— 13 children born not of natural descent, nor of human decision or a husband’s will, but born of God.

1 Peter 2:5
5 you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house[a] to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ

Revelation 1:5-6
To him who loves us and has freed us from our sins by his blood, 6 and has made us to be a kingdom and priests to serve his God and Father—to him be glory and power for ever and ever! Amen.

We are greatly loved, mighty and powerful indeed. I pray you have a great week and you start to be, know and do like you never have before.

Love, Honor & Cherish

Marriage is important to God. It is serious business.

You and I were created for relationships, and the Bible is all about relationships - our vertical relationship with God, through Jesus, and our relationships with others.
St. Augustine made the statement, “our hearts are restless until we find our rest in God.” We were designed for a relationship with Him.
God created us to have relationship with others – people we could live and learn with. Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 12:18-21,  “But now God has placed the members, each one of them, in the body, just as He desired.” In preparation for this lesson, I read this statement, "If God deeply desires to place us in relationship with the body of Christ (the church), doesn’t that mean He also desires to place us with the spouse of His choice?"
Do you see that shift? It's not about who we want to marry - or arrange for our children to marry - but who God desires to place us with.
Marriage then, for me, becomes a supernatural, God-valued, serious part of our lives.

But, why would God create marriage? Why is it important?
Marriage is the most intimate (closest) of human relationships. Of all your Earthly relationships - all of them - the closest, the most intimate, the most endeared is the one with your spouse. No relationship trumps the relationship with your spouse. If others - even children - have come between you and your spouse, your marriage is in trouble.

Why is the marriage relationship the most precious? In Romans 8:29, Paul writes, "For God knew His people in advance, and He chose them to become like His son (Christ-like)." We know from Jeremiah that God knew us before we were born, and God desires us to be conformed to the image of His son, Jesus. Marriage - being bound to someone for a lifetime - forces us to care for someone other than self, to consider someone other than self, to love someone more than self. What better than marriage sharpens us toward putting self aside and being more like Jesus? Remember the traditional vows: Love, Honor & Cherish (putting spouse ahead of self) Until Death Do Us Part?

Marriage is God's way of teaching us to be more Christ-like. Knowing this about marriage helps us understand why we should be praying every day for our spouse. Single folk should be praying for their future spouse. Parents should be praying for the future spouses of their children . . . and grandchildren. Who do you have chosen, Lord, and hear and direct my prayers for them?

The problem in our culture, friends, is that we don't take seriously the things of God. We have reduced church - the bride of Christ - to another organization through which to impress our friends. We claim to pray for others, but never do it. We've trivialized marriage. Many marriages are doomed to fail before they even begin.

In some faiths, marriage (Matrimony) is a Holy sacrament. Even in Baptist services, pastors and officiants will refer to Holy Matrimony. Matrimony is a union; wedlock means joined or locked together. Holy means "set apart." And, so marriage is a bound - locked - relationship that is set apart by God - set apart from all the other relationships in your life. Because it is a relationship set apart by God, God has His hands on it. It's a covenant with God - a solemn and binding relationship meant to last a lifetime. God is so serious about His covenants with us - including marriage - that He sees them as a Walk into Death. God sees these covenants as a walk all the way to death. In the Old Testament, when two people made a covenant with one another, a goat or lamb would be slain and its carcass would be cut in half. With the two halves lying on the ground, the two people forming the covenant would solemnize their promise by walking between the carcass halves. That's how serious God sees marriage.

I don't like television shows like The Bachelor because it takes a God-breathed covenant like marriage and dumbs it down to our culture. Marriage is not a whimsical affair. We focus more on rings, dresses, flowers, parties, showers, bachelor parties, registering and honeymoon trips than we focus on the Holiness of what we are entering - a lifetime commitment with another human toward the goal of sharpening one another into deeper followers of Jesus. I refuse to officiate a wedding that, in planning and delivery, replaces holiness with culturalism. That's not to say that you can't have all the fun - I love a good wedding reception - but the celebration should be the union of two people and their covenant with God. What would a wedding reception look like if families of the bride and groom circled them for prayer before the party began? Many people enter marriage with a focus on the ceremony and parties - not the lifetime commitment that follows when all the guests go home.

The covenant is for a lifetime - until death do us part - because God doesn't go away and neither should we. God expects the covenant to stay around, too. And, marriage doesn't get easier as you grow older nor does a 25- or 50-year Anniversary translate into an immunity from problems. Many empty-nesters find their marriages have "lost purpose" once the children are grown, and spouses begin to look for new territory. As we get older, we begin to think about "bucket lists" that we want to accomplish without our spouses along. Satan hates God, and God is at the center of marriage. No marriage - until death has claimed it - is secure from Satan's attacks.

What about divorce? Clearly, and without question, divorce is not a a part of the marriage equation. That's why so much due diligence is required before marriage. It's why parents must coach children toward dating / engagement that involves prayer, faith conversations, parental counseling and formal counseling. Young people must know that marriage is serious business and divorce is not an option. But . . . certainly divorce is a reality in our broken world. Divorce is inevitable because of our broken world. Even in the Old Testament, Moses permitted divorce provided the two parties wrote a letter requesting it. Even in Moses' day it was relatively easy to get a divorce, but Moses required the letter to ensure the parties had thought it through.

Jesus was asked about divorce in Matthew 19:5-6. He responded this way, "Haven’t you read Scripture? God made them male and female. This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into ONE. Since they are no longer two but one, let no one separate them for God has joined them together.”
Someone asked Jesus, “Well, what about Moses and that letter-writing business?”
Jesus said, “Moses permitted divorce as a concession to your hard-hearted wickedness, but it was not what God originally wanted. And, I tell you this, a man who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery – unless his wife has been unfaithful.” (And, in our culture, that goes both ways)."

In fact, Paul, in 2 Corinthians, implies that if you aren't going to take marriage gravely seriously, it’s better to remain single.

So, what are the purposes of a marriage:

1. Cooperation – Genesis 2:18, “It is not good for man to be alone. I will make him a helper comparable to him.” Comparable to him means similar and equal to him, compatible, to help and support one another in all things. It’s a partnership because two heads are better than one. Cooperation toward what? Making disciples of Jesus . . . not pooling money or working together for a better economic status.
2. Procreation – Procreation is about preserving humankind from extinction. But, understand this, Christianity does not make procreation or children the primary purpose of marriage – the primary purpose is cooperation. That’s why childless couples should not grieve God’s plan for them. Procreation – producing children from a sanctified home - is equivalent to generating missionaries into a hopeless world. God wants these children raised in faith so they can go marry someone who is a believer, and continue making disciples.
3. Sexual Intimacy - It's the sexual intimacy that protects the marriage against adultery and fornication (consensual intercourse between two non-married people). In 1 Corinthians 7:1-16, Paul writes that "the wife’s body does not belong to her and the man’s body does not belong to him. Each should fulfill their marital responsibilities; not depriving one another except by mutual consent." If you start monkeying around with sexual intimacy in your marriage – using it as a weapon, being influenced by sinful self-esteem about how your body looks, allowing yourself to get so busy that you are too tired – I promise that your marriage will begin to unravel. We are sexual beings made aware of it by man’s fall in the garden of Eden. When sexual intimacy disappears from marriage, most people will give in to a lack of self control and find the intimacy in other places - pornography if not adultery. The door becomes wide open for Satan to bombard the marriage. Christian Marriage elevates the bodily union to become a spiritual union, through the Holy Spirit, just as the Holy Spirit works in the Baptismal water to make humans a new creation.  The Holy Spirit also works in the couple during the marital ceremony, through prayers and faith to unite them in the Lord.  Through the commitments made by the bride and groom in fulfilling the commandments of marriage, and the work of the Holy Spirit, the two partners become one.
4. Reigning – Genesis 1:28, “God said them – man and woman, whom He created separately and purposefully – be fruitful and multiply, and fill the Earth and subdue it.” We must be good stewards and good managers of God’s creation, and I like to further than by saying, “We must be reminded to lead our families in making disciples of Jesus so that all who are on the Earth hear the gospel.”

In closing, I want to give you a few practical things to think about and discuss with your spouse concerning your day-to-day relationship.

1. Love your spouse as God loves us. Sacrificially. What can I put aside to make my spouse’s day better? What can I sacrifice? What speaks love into my spouse: Quality time, encouraging words, gifts, a hug or hand-holding, acts of service? My life? My body?
2. Honor your spouse. 1 Peter 3:7, paraphrased, honor your spouse – be considerate and treat them with respect. Not because they earn it but because through your covenant they deserve it. Being considerate means considering your spouse's feelings and responses before you act; respect them by holding them up as revered – not chiseling away at their reputation.
3. Cherish your spouse. Cherish means “To cultivate with care – to make the person feel special – the most special person to you.” Here's how we cherish our spouse:
1. Sacrifice.
2. Listening.
3. Touching.
4. Being With Them In Public.
5. Saying Kind Things About Them In Public.
6. Sharing Responsibilities.
7. Never Allowing Children or Parents or Siblings To Come Between Spouses.
8. Admiration.
9. Respect.
10. Seeing Every Day As Valentine’s Day.
11. Opening Doors Of Possibility – "Where You Go, I Go."
12. Taking Time To Be Alone With One Another.
13. And, Men, Providing Spiritual Leadership. Men: Have you abandoned spiritual leadership in your home?

Marriage is serious business. Marriage is serious to God because it sharpens us as followers of Jesus and it produces disciples. It is a contract with God. And, God takes His contracts seriously.

Love The Unlovable

As I prepared this week, I heard the Holy Spirit speak to me and to all of us:
“You know the attitudes and sinful actions that hold you back from completely following me. I want to do greater things with you, but I can’t until you make some changes that free you to follow me more closely.” 
I don’t know what those changes are for you, but I’m pretty sure that you know what they are.
I know what they are for me.
One place of change for all of us is in loving the unlovable, and working to be more lovable ourselves.

• Are there people in your life who get on your nerves? If you see them in the grocery store you intentionally dodge them? 
• Are there family members or loved ones who have hurt you deeply?
• Have you been cheated by business partners or neighbors? Swindled?
• Deep down, do you loathe people because of their attitudes, their socio-economic position, the color of their skin, the worship of their God?
• Do you get tired of hearing about how wonderful life is for your neighbor?
• Do you get frustrated when people you love keep making the same dumb mistakes over and over and over again?
• Is there a supervisor or co-worker who just has your number? Oppressive?
• Betrayed? Lied to? Belittled? Ridiculed? Humiliated? Physically or emotionally beaten?
• Maybe it’s just people who walk around like “Eeyore” – woe is me all the time? Maybe it’s people who never smile. Maybe it’s people who are so manic and bi-polar you never know who’s coming at you? Jekyll or Hyde? Unpredictable personalities can just suck the life out of you.
• What about those who whine, complain and live in the drama of “you love them more than you love me.”

It goes on and on. People are unlovable. We are all unlovable.

But, as followers of Jesus we have a problem.
Two of the non-negotiable truths of our faith are these: We must love everyone, and we must forgive everyone. Everyone. No exceptions. Love and forgive everyone. Why? Because Jesus loves and forgives us beyond our transgressions toward Him, and as followers we must reciprocate that toward everyone else.

Mark 12:31 reads, "Love your neighbor as yourself." The New American Standard says it this way, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” The International Standard says, “You must love your neighbor.” All translations identify this as a “command” from Jesus, and there’s no wiggle room in a command. Read Luke 10:25-37, the parable of the Good Samaritan. When hearing "love your neighbor," people began looking for wiggle room. Someone asked Jesus, "Who is my neighbor?" In the Good Samaritan story, Jesus tells of the Jew who stopped to help his cultural enemy, the Samaritan. In this, Jesus said, "Everyone is your neighbor. Love everyone."

In Mark 5:43-48, we read, "Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." This is Jesus speaking.

In Ephesians 4:31-32, Paul writes, “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in  Christ forgave you.” That’s why we have to love and forgive one another. If we are going to follow Jesus, we must draw closer to Him and be more like Him.

Okay, I can forgive the person who pulls out in front of me in traffic. Or, the person who is having a bad day and vents on me. I can even forgive the Sunday School teacher who forgot to call me when I was sick. But, what about those in my life who screwed me over, scarred me emotionally and sent me into therapy? Yep, love and forgive . . . everyone. No exceptions.

This must have bothered Peter, because in Matthew 18:22 the famed disciple came to Jesus and asked,
“How often should I forgive someone?” Rabbis were teaching you only had to forgive someone three times. Peter suggested, to Jesus, that His followers do the right thing and increase the number of cheek-turning  times from three to seven. I can imagine Jesus laughing at the idiocy of this request when he exclaimed, "No! Seventy times seven." Jesus chose 490 times, showing that such a large number would equate for us to infinity. You are commanded to love and forgive . . . everyone. No exceptions.

Jesus goes on to tell the story of the unforgiving debtor, in Matthew 18:23-35. A king was approached by someone in his debt. The debtor begged for mercy and the king extended the mercy. Then, the debtor turned around and confronted someone who owed him. When the debtor's debtor begged for mercy, the debtor had his debtor arrested. The king found out about it. The angry kind then had his debtor sent to prison to be tortured until he had paid his debts.

Do you get it? God is the king. We approach God needing mercy for our debts, and He provided Jesus. He extended grace beyond our understanding and grace beyond our deserving. He loved the unlovable. So, then we turn to see the unlovable in our own lives. When we don't reciprocate God's love for us, we put ourselves in front of God's law. In my own life, I know what's it like to be tortured by the Holy Spirit - to be out of fellowship with God - until my attitudes toward my debtors changed.

Remember the Lord's Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13). "And forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven our debtors. (v. 12). We chant The Lord's Prayer so much that we gloss over it, don't we?

When I talk about love and forgiveness toward everyone, I always have people who want to argue in order to justify hating someone. "Well, what if so and so isn't a believer? Doesn't all this apply only to believers? What if the person isn't sorry or repentant?" Jesus says "everyone." And, I choose to err on the safe side: I just love and forgive and move on. The alternative is to fester on negative attitudes that allow Satan to whisper in my ear.

Above, you read that Jesus says, "pray for those who persecute you." So, in loving and forgiving, we need to pray for the unlovable. But, there's more. At the Last Supper, Jesus is surrounded by men who said they loved Him deeply, but treated Him poorly. Thomas would doubt His resurrection; James and John had fought over who He loved more; Peter aggravated Him and would deny Him; and Judas would betray Him. And, the others, you bet they aggravated Him, too, never quite understanding who He was or what He was, and stumbling all over themselves.

And, yet, look at what Jesus did. They gather for the Last Supper – Jesus and this rag tag bunch – and in John 13:4 we read, “So Jesus got up from the table, took off his robe, wrapped a towel around his waist, and poured water into a basin. Then he began to wash his disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel he had around him.” Jesus loved the unlovable by serving them.

Love the unlovable? As followers of Jesus, we have no choice. We must love them and forgive them, completely. And, we must pray for them, and we must serve them. Why? Because we follow a risen Savior who has done and does the same for us. Followers of Jesus have no choice.

But, I have to add something, here, too. Each of us is a problem-child for someone else. Each of us, even if we don’t really know it, is one of the unlovable to someone else. It might not be anything you have done; might just be an attitude. It might just be unfriendliness or even the perception of unfriendliness. It might be aggravation. Perhaps you slip into melancholy and can't help but advertising to the world.

It’s tough to wander through this life and not be someone’s unlovable. I believe every single one of us is someone's unlovable, and perhaps we are unlovable to more than one. I know that there are some who don't love me because my actions and attitudes are unlovable. I know there are some who don't like me either.

And, so, in closing, I want to offer some things that I try to practice (with varying degrees of success) toward being more lovable. You can look at Jesus' teaching in Matthew 5:3-10 for some of these: Practice humility, be merciful, be a champion for peace, do the right thing, and love and serve people. Here are some others from my own playbook:

• Point conversations to other people and their lives. What is your story? How is your family?
• Avoid complaining to those with whom you don't have relational credibility. Certainly, friends should go to friends with all kinds of concerns and problems, but chronic complaining to casual acquaintances and strangers does no one any good.
• Be genuine. Be the same at home as you are in public. If you can't do that, what should you be changing at home? Read Galatians 5 - the fruits of the spirit - what are yours? Be that person.
• Don't be the person who has ideas for others to implement. No one likes to be around the person who says, "I have an idea for you to do." Don't start something you can't finish.
• Be quietly kind. Ask yourself, "Do I love these people as Jesus loves me?"
• Practice hospitality. It doesn't matter where you live or even how clean it is. Opening your home to others is a genuine sign of loving people.

And, just remember, all of this love and service is toward one goal: Building relationship through which we can ultimately talk about our love for Jesus.

The Change Up

God gave me a lesson to teach this week, but then He hijacked that lesson and replaced it with another.

Reading this week from the book of Romans - written by Paul - I came across the familiar verse of Romans 12:2-3: "Don't copy the behavior and customs of the world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then, you will know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect." I understand the larger context of that verse, but it spoke to me differently this time: "Change the way you think, Scott, change up the way you are living. Let God use that to transform you."

I came away from Christmas this year somewhat sick at my stomach.

Every year, we go to bed late on Christmas Eve and get up early on Christmas morning. Then, we rush through our family time so that we can pack up and get on the road to Atlanta. We must be at my parents’ house by 4:30 or 5 because at 5:30 we sit down to a meal of prime rib, Aunt Lou’s rice, green beans cooked in fat back, some kind of strawberry salad, Sister Shubert’s frozen dinner rolls, and chocolate layer cake for dessert. Then, we descend into the great room – all 21 of us – for a marathon of opening gifts most of which everyone knows will be exchanged so receipts are included inside the gift. Then, we watch a little television and go to bed. The next day, Christmas is over, and we all begin to drift back to our homes, and my parents are generally glad to see us leave, taking the chaos of the Christmas celebration with us. Each year, it is a mind-numbing exercise in routine. Over and over, year after year, it is the same scene in the same drama of our lives. And, because it’s monotonous, going-through-motions, the same old same old, we begin to get lethargic with Christmas and with family. Our celebration, unintentionally, becomes stagnant. Christmas becomes more about the “doing just to get it over with” rather than “celebrating family through Christmas.” It's time for a change up.

And, stagnation in one area of our life begins to infect every corner of our lives. Our days, our months, our years all begin to look like one another. Did you celebrate Valentine’s Day the same old way as last year? Flowers, card, candy, dinner out, sex? Maybe all the pieces were there, but how different would it be say if you had sex first? Then, you ate the candy together in bed. At least it would be different. What? Not without alcohol? Well, maybe a little champagne breakfast is just what you and yours need on a Valentine’s Day. And, this year, on a Thursday! Now, that's changing it up!

Stagnation and lethargy are suffocating the human experience. Vicki and I were in Washington DC this past weekend. I was the speaker at a church communication clinic,and we decided to turn the trip into a Valentine's getaway. On Friday, she wanted to visit the national Holocaust Museum. I had been there before, and so I let Vicki tour at her own pace. I went to the various “reflection” areas just to think and pray and listen to the testimonies of the Holocaust survivors. A message kept coming through to me, “count every single day as precious – count every single day as an opportunity to really live it. Don’t let your life become complacent. Don’t let your life become lethargic and stagnant.”

Change things up. Keep your life fresh. Value your relationships.

• Every day with your spouse should be like your first date with your spouse. 
• Every day with your children should be like the first day you held them.
• Every day with your Savior should be like the day you first confessed Jesus as your Savior.

The problem is that life calls us to conformity. It's easy (lazy, I say) to just get into routines and schedules and habits, walking like zombies through life and leaving a wake of complacency, lethargy and stagnation. We do the same things the same way - year after year after year - and then we moan from our death beds, "Where did my life go?" I will tell  you this, more and more I am an advocate of "change for the sake of change." Let's just do things differently. And, see if we can't experience a revival of God in our lives because of it.

Perhaps the most sad thing of all is when we let our faith – our precious faith – slip into stagnation. It is so easy for our faith lives and our practice of faith to be no different in 2013 than it was in 2012, 2011, 2010, and 2009. And, I laugh when I hear people say, “I will be a better believer when my children are grown because I will have more time for church and faith.” Great for you - not so good for your children. And, the most unchurched group of people in America? Empty-nesters, who no longer feel the pressure to have their children at church. Stagnation today will be even greater tomorrow. It's a cancer.

You and I need a new enthusiasm.
We need a new enthusiasm over our faith. We need a new enthusiasm over time with Scripture, prayer, the gathering of believers, and the service toward others.
We need a new enthusiasm over our spouses.
We need a new enthusiasm over our children, parents and siblings.
We need a new enthusiasm over the family calendar.
We need a new enthusiasm over our friends, and the finding of new friends in faith.
We need a new enthusiasm over evangelism and telling others about Jesus.
We need a new enthusiasm over this precious life we have been given.

I pray every day that you and I can be part of a revival in Lexington, SC. Not that we necessarily lead it, but that we just have opportunity to be a part  of it. I want to see men and women, husbands and wives, say, I’m going to love Jesus deeply and my life – my priorities, my calendar and even my bank account – will show it. I'm going to change things up.

I’m going to open the Bible every day. I’m going to pray every day – even if I just close my eyes and sit quietly. I’m going to stun my wife by sitting beside her on the sofa and holding her hand – not toward the goal of seeing her naked, but just because I love her. I’m going to go on walks with my children – individually – so I can hear their voices, and I’m not going to be a dream-killer when they share the dreams of their hearts. For no reason whatsoever, I am going to call my parents and siblings and just say, "I love you and I appreciate you."

I decided in December that I would change things up by adding weekly exercise to my calendar. My med-school son pushed me further. "You can't work out 2-3 days a week, dad, and then go eat Rush's chili cheeseburgers. Count your calories, watch  your salt and what your fat. But, mostly, dad, do something every day - walk 20 minutes every day. Do something to get your heart rate going."

I've gotten to where I look forward to the daily walk of 60 minutes or more. I use the time to pray or to listen to Scripture on my iPod, or just listen to a good book - usually fiction or a biography - on tape. I feel better because of the walk. I've met some good people who have encouraged me and whom I have encouraged. I sleep better because of the exercise, and because I sleep better my days are more rested and focused. I'm getting more work done in less time. I'm more patient and sympathetic because I'm more rested and feel better. One hour of walking every day has changed a lot of different places of my life. That one hour has shaken me out of a lethargy that beset me in the final quarter of 2012.

Change something. Let God shake open your life like shaking out a bed sheet on a nice Spring morning. What can God do with me and you if we just change some things to live today differently from this day last year and from yesterday? Revival begins with me and you. We need to change things up.

The Love Dilemma - Friendship

I love Sunday School. I always have.

As a boy, even when I sat under the teaching of boring old teachers, I still could not wait to get to Sunday School. It was about seeing the other guys, and it was about seeing if someone new would show up. I did not know it then, as I know it now, but there’s so much fun in seeing who God will send on any given Sunday.

I have been to a church property almost every Sunday morning of my life, and have rarely missed an opportunity to be in Sunday School. On vacation, I go to a church and visit Sunday School. Even today as my work – my ministry – takes me to churches all over North America, I will find a Sunday School class and visit.

I know the name sounds stupid – Sunday School. It has implications of small children sitting in a circle. It’s embarrassing to say to adult friends, “Will you go with me to Sunday School?” conjuring up images of Kool-Aid, crayons and round butter cookies. But, I’m not ashamed of it. Sunday School is so much a part of my spiritual DNA that I would crawl to church with a fever rather than miss it. 

What is it that I love? I love seeing people. I still love seeing – every Sunday – who God will send. I love the community – that arm-in-arm laughter together, service together, and work together. Sunday School brings together what I love about faith, the fellowship of believers, and the service to others. Everything is bundled up in one great package.

I realize that everyone does not love Sunday School like I do. For some it’s a place to wait while children are in other ministry areas. That’s okay. Everyone can have their own reason for being in Sunday School. God sent you, and that’s all that matters. But, you get out of it – in encouragement, correction, care, and friendship – what you put into it. To have a friend, you have to first be a friend.

And, I guess that’s it for me. Sunday School is where my true friends live with me. I have lived enough life in a lot of different places and with a lot of different people to know how fickle and shallow people can be. Many are great friends while your lives intersect around this or that, but when life’s cards reshuffle, they are gone. Friends in faith – friends in faith stay with you. Many of my friends on Facebook are ancient friends – and the thread that binds us is the thread of faith. It’s like God laced our lives together – many through Sunday School classes – and I love that about my life. And, I love that God is still lacing my life with others – true friendships – friendships through faith that are cultivated through Sunday School.

And, I love my friends.

I do. Man or woman. When God plows my life together with another person, it’s distinctive. Vicki will always be my best friend. No other person will challenge her for that role. You will never hear me say another human being is my best friend, but her. But, I am aware that God has laced my life with friends in faith, and those relationships are defined clearly by certain characteristics. I encourage  you to examine your friendships against these five definitions. See how your friendships, see how your allegiances stack up. Do you have the lifelong friends of faith?

• Faith defines them. 2 Corinthians 6:14 is clear. Don’t be mismatched with unbelievers. Don’t marry them. Don’t be in business with them. Don’t weave your life tightly with them. Friends will know one another’s faith story, and it’s impossible to share a faith story with saying the word, “Jesus.” In no way I am suggesting you can’t be friendly with an unbeliever – you can and you should build relationship toward introducing that person to Jesus. You must have unbelievers in your life to be a follower of Jesus, and you must love those unbelievers toward a goal of seeing them saved. But, those with whom you weave your live together in tight relationship – Scripture says they should also be believers, and you and I should confess to them and hear them confess as well. Can’t do it? Examine your heart and your relationship with Jesus. Friends are a gift from God, but to understand that – Jesus must be confessed in the center of it. My friends have heard me talk about Jesus.
• Love defines them. 1 Samuel 18:1. “After David had finished talking with Saul, he met Jonathan, the king’s son. There was an immediate bond between then, for Jonathan loved David.” Jonathan loved David and David loved Jonathan in the way that Jesus loved Lazarus and wept for him. I’ve stood over the gravesite of childhood friends, and wept over memories not because I was sad, but because I loved them. When my life becomes woven with someone, they know the depths of me and I know the depths of them. It’s impossible to be in that deep of a relationship and not love each other deeply, and for me – expressively. My friends know that I love them. I tell them. I find the courage to tell them.
• Truth defines them. In Matthew 26:34, Jesus tells Peter, whom he loved, “Truly I say to you, Peter, this night, before the rooster crows three times, you will betray me.” In Matthew 16:23, Jesus, angry at Peter, says, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me.” Friends tell friends the truth – and sometimes it’s going to pinch. You don’t really have friends if you can’t tell them the truth, and they can’t tell you the truth. And, you need to fall to your knees and thank God for the friend who can see your life unfolding foolishly through careless mistakes and say, “Stop right now. You need to stop. You have to change. It’s for your own good.” I love my friends so deeply that I am willing to hurt their feelings for their own good.
• Laughter and Grief define them. In Luke 10:21, Jesus sends out his disciples and they return talking about the great things the Spirit has done through them, and Luke writes, “At that same time, Jesus was filled with joy of the Holy Spirit and began to pray. He said to the disciples, his friends in faith, “you have seen what kings only wish they could see.” I have to believe that Jesus was laughing, even as he prayed. Likewise, we do know that in John 11:35 that “Jesus wept” at the news that his friend, Lazarus had died. Friendship will be defined by sharing the width and depth of both joy and grief together. When you laugh, I laugh with you; when you grieve, I grieve with you. My life is your life. My friends know I am walking in this life with them - good and bad.
• Failure and Redemption defines them. In Mark 14, we know that the rooster did crow, indeed, and we know that Peter did deny Jesus. Wound so closely together, friends do fail one another. We get selfish and we overlook another’s needs. We get jealous of one another. We want to say, “I was there for you, but you were not there for me.” We slip up and say, “Your children drive me crazy.” But, friends in faith know that there is restoration. Peter was Jesus' friend, and Peter was forgiven and restored by Jesus, in John 21. Jesus asks Peter, three times, if he loved Him. Peter responds yes all three times, and Jesus says, “Go and feed my sheep.” I am quick to forgive my friends when they injure me.

I have lived in five different communities – moving to places and not knowing a single soul. I've served on a hospital board of directors. I have been involved in philanthropy, serving on local boards of the cancer society and the heart association. I have been involved in Rotary clubs, and Kiwanis clubs, and the Jaycees. I have been in booster clubs. I have been a leader in recreation sports organizations. I have stood in pouring rain collecting money for the Empty Stocking Funds, cooked hamburgers for booster clubs, and walked 10 miles for the March of Dimes. I have had friends at work, and friends in my neighborhood. As a loyal customer, even today I’m friends with most of the managers at the stores I visit. My doctor is even my close friend.

But, I have no friends like those in faith - those in  Sunday School. If I died today, I would want my faith friends to carry my casket, I would trust my faith friends to minister to Vicki and the boys, and I would want my faith friends to pray at my graveside. There are no holier friends than those with whom we share Jesus and Christian fellowship. And, for me, it begins and ends with Sunday School.